Carolina Valdez Miller

Hope, Love, and Light

2012-01-27T00:37:00.000-05:00

Today we leave for home, so we had our final clinic in Haiti yesterday in nearby Thomas in what seemed to be a more prosperous location than other areas we’d held clinics in. And yet, so much suffering still. Everything was going fairly smoothly, and then the medical team had a patient who’d had a stroke and fallen into a fire some time ago. His injuries were treated by a voodoo witch doctor with charcoal. You can imagine the severity of infection at this point. We were all twisted up inside to see him get his wounds treated by Medical…the pain he was in, knowing as well there was nothing we could do to help him recover from the stroke. But we got past that, as we knew we had to.

In dental, we had an interesting mix of patients. This is an area that sees clinics like ours more often than most, so some of the patients seemed to be aware that you can numb the mouth before pulling teeth. One woman was terrified we were going to pull her teeth without a shot. Our translator was busy elsewhere, so it was difficult to reassure her. This is one of the toughest things about working with people that speak a language we don’t know—it’s much harder to earn their trust, especially if they’ve had any difficulty with teeth pulling or doctors, etc. before. All we can do is speak as soothingly as possible, rubbing their arms, holding their hands—or in my case, massaging their temples and shoulders and brushing fingers over their cheeks. We had a patient that was eighty years old who broke my heart. She was so upset after we numbed her mouth, so scared of the way it felt. She thought we were going to pull her teeth right off the bat as surely most of her teeth had been pulled before. She had no idea we could anesthetize, and was frightened by the way it felt—until her teeth were pulled painlessly.

And so the day went along as usual, patients and more patients. Sickness, infected mouths and rotted teeth, medicine getting dispensed, et cetera. We had some singing and joking as usual. John tattooed everyone’s arms with a sharpie and Dr. Jeff played his iPod until it ran out of battery. It felt like an easier clinic at first. Relatively. But everything altered a bit when a woman came in with her malnourished baby as a result of an insufficient milk supply. A baby that looked like a preemie, even though it was two months old.

This baby was dying.

Nurse Linda fed him glucose water with a syringe, and then put the baby to his mother’s breast to try and stimulate her milk production. But it was clear this baby would likely die anyway. You can imagine how hard this was to face. We were right there, Medical doing all they could in the little bit of time we had, but it wouldn’t be enough.

There was a second baby, too. His mother was dying—I’m not really sure why as the family didn’t bring her. You can imagine what happens when there’s no one to feed a baby, too. So we had another baby in crisis. The baby’s family was desperate to find a new home for him and tried to give him away to Dr. Mark. As if he could take him.

This is when many of us finally broke down.

And then it was time to go, and we had to walk away. Two babies, a stroke and burn victim, and countless others left behind, their fate uncertain. We’ll likely never know what will happen to them.

That’s the thing about this sort of mission. Every patient must be treated as if you will never see them again, because you almost certainly won’t.

I used to wonder if I was strong enough for this. I suppose I must be. We all must be, because we’re still here, smiling through that sadness that comes from knowing too much. I know we’ve all changed a little bit. Broken apart and put ourselves back together again—not entirely whole, and yet somehow full to the brim...with hope and love and light. These things are remarkably filling.

To borrow words from Dana, our team pharmacist…

"It’s a privilege to be here. A privilege and a blessing."

What little we gave to the Haitians, they have returned to us tenfold.

Hope. Love. Light.

If we’re lucky, we’ll get to come back to Haiti to find that piece of ourselves we left behind. Until then, may we carry a piece of Haiti with us. And may we pass it on to you and you and you.

Toujours nous serons frères.

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If any family or friends of the team leave comments, I'll be sure to pass them on. So far those comments that have been left have been well received by your loved ones. It's strengthening to hear a loved voice from afar, especially here. If you have no way to contact your friend or family and would like to, feel free to email the address noted on my profile as well, and I'll get them the message.

Emotional in Haiti

2012-01-26T00:15:00.001-05:00

I apologize for the delay in updates. Monday was our first mobile clinic, and from then on, it was non-stop work. It's been an exhausting time for all of us full of emotional ups and downs. But it's late, and we have another clinic tomorrow at nearby Tomas (sp?), our final clinic here in Haiti. Every one of the clinics, each in a different location, has been distinctly different. To give you an idea, without having to spend the next two hours trying to sum it all up, I thought I might borrow from the emails I've been sending to my writers'group every night I hope they don't mind. Keep in mind this has just been my personal experience. I can hardly speak for the others on the team, but it might give you an idea of what the clinics have been like. Intense, to say the least. It will also let you see the sort of journey we're on. Talk about a range of emotions...

Monday in Haiti
Today has been a difficult day. Physically and emotionally exhaustive. Another day like today will take the wind out of me. It's right about now I'm wondering what I'm doing here. We can't fix this place. I feel so helpless. Everything we do, it's just a bandaid. This climb, oh god it was treacherous and dangerous, a ceaseless uphill climb over powdery dirt and loose rock that slides like walking on marbles. Not an inch of level ground to rest for 3 hours, and the pressing need to get there. No rest at the top, and then on my feet for hours holding the head of people flinching and quietly crying, but never screaming while their rotting teeth are pulled out, their mouths so infected the anesthetic doesn't work. Not even a real dental chair, just a rickety wooden thing. Every one of them I held and comforted and rubbed their shoulders, but it's just a bandaid. I'm really sad today. There just aren't words for what I've seen. We've done all we could. And it's not enough.

Now, take a look at today's:

Wednesday in Haiti:
Took the bus on a 3 hour journey to Gonaive (?), a very poor village way in the sticks. We were greeted by the most gracious people. They built a brand new outhouse just for us. The cement was still wet when we got there. As always, all the village people were dressed in their Sunday best, staring at us as the spectacle we Americans are. But they always greet us with smiles, if at first with a little hesitation. But if you say bonjou, they will always say it back. If you hold out your hand, they will always take it. But unlike the other clinics, we had no issues with crowding or people trying to cut in line (if you saw the massive lines that form, you'd understand why they might try to get ahead)--today alone, we treated 500 people. And nearly every patient we had in the dental chairs thanked us before they left.

But it had been ten years since a clinic like ours had seen their village. They were so grateful to have us there. You could just see the pastor beaming to see us. But they were also some of the most desperate people we've seen.

Just in dental, we had two faint, one vomit, and one seizure. Poor Kate got splattered with blood twice. You should know all of this happened when the head was in my hands (that's my job--holding heads and comforting patients). Oddly enough, they had all been in Dr. Lee's chair, although I think this was merely coincidence as he's brilliant (as is Dr. Jeff). We were beginning to get used to the fainting and severe reactions, which we think stems not only from fear (think of the kind of pain they must have endured having their teeth pulled by the local pastor over the last ten years), but also from the lack of food in their bellies. One woman started to lean--and I wrapped my arms around her to hold her in place and said, "We lost another one." But then she buckled and started seizing in my arms, and the whole chair tipped forward. It was all I could do not to crash on my face. Lee and Kate and Kris all dived and kept us from face planting, but the poor woman was out. We moved her to the ground and propped her feet up. Dr. Mark checked her out, and she was conscious responding to his commands in Kreyol. Eventually her family came and got her, and she walked out with a mouth full of numbness and no teeth pulled, poor woman. The faintings and vomiting were men. But oddly enough, it was our best clinic yet, full of joy and hope and singing from us changing the lyrics to well known songs ("This is the tooth Dr. Lee will take. Let us rejoice and be glad in it." Dr. Jeff insisted Lee's head would blow up being surrounded by us women, who cheer and dance when the tooth comes out. One elderly patient, smiling like the sun had risen just for him, asked Kris to stay in Haiti. It was great fun.

In medical, they saw a case of malaria and a woman severely dehydrated. They did the best they could to hydrate her intravenously without tubing. Not an easy feat. Nor was the abused child left behind with an infection--a sad enough case Nurse Carolyn had to walk out of the room. They also saw a boy in a wheelchair--only 17 years old, paralyzed from falling out of a tree. I know it was hard on them. Haiti is full of stories like this. It is at times overwhelming. And then you see a woman who has spent the better part of 30 years using a rope latched around her useless foot as a crutch to walk. Now this is inspiring (as is the medical team itself which works hard. I hear constant laughter from them in the face of difficult times). The same with the pharmacy team, which works so efficiently, they somehow keep lines from forming. They also keep the other two teams functioning, providing us with all the meds we need, not to mention snacks, lunch, and toilet paper. It's more complicated than that though, as they have to keep all the meds sorted and organized, mixed, bagged, dispensed etc.--out of suitcases. We're also really grateful for our Haitian interpreters, who are not only great at translation, but also kind--to us and to the patients. They're as much a part of our team as the Americans here.

Honestly, it's been quite an experience with a remarkable group of people. I will be sad to see them go on Friday. But we still have one more clinic. One last chance to bring a little sunshine to a few people. We can't fix all the problems in Haiti. But we can fix the pain and suffering of a few. And that's enough.

(I can't really upload pictures right now, but I promise I'll get some up after I get back and give a more thorough account all that's happened. I'm hoping to get to talk to some of the others in medical and pharmacy to get a better perspective on what they've faced. But I know they must have dealt with the same sorts of hardships we have. This sort of mission is not for the feint of heart.)

P.S. If you're a family member or friend of someone on the team, I'll be sure to pass on any comments you leave to your family/friend. Nancy, Dr. Lee was quite touched when I stopped him right before a clinic to tell him his sister said hello and that he was in your thoughts. His first question, "Do you know Nancy???" Ha.

Our First Day in Haiti

2012-01-22T20:16:00.000-05:00

Written Friday, January 20, 2011 (first night in Haiti)

(I apologize there are so few pictures. It's taking so long to upload them, and now that I was able to finally get on, I want to work fast before I lose the signal. I promise I'll post Morepictures as soon as I can.)

We arrived in Port Au Prince, Haiti around 9:30 this morning (Friday), and somehow we managed to get through immigration and customs by 10:30 (AM, not PM). Everything went really smoothly, which started us all off on the right foot.

But we were exhausted. Our flight from Indianapolis actually left at 5:00 Thursday night, taking us to Dallas, where we had a fairly short layover, and then sat on the plane for over an hour waiting to take off for Miami. By the time we actually got there, we had all of two to two and a half hours to actually get any rest. Some of us chose to get showers instead of sleep.

So…people like me got all of a half hour of sleep before boarding the plane to Haiti.

When we got here we were greeted by Haitian music initially, and then as we stepped out, a bit of culture shock. Haiti is like no place else, a country so devastated by poverty and leveled by the earthquake two years ago.Tent cities are still commonplace. No clean water. No major stores. No fast food or restaurants. So many of the little shops seem to be run out of shacks. Schools, churches—everything is run down and crumbling.

And then we stopped by a site of mass graves, one of the most tragic reminders of the earthquake.

We were, as one, deeply moved and saddened, letting our breaths slow and our minds absorb the significance of what we were seeing.

After an hour long, bumpy bus ride in the heat with intermittent honking of a blaring bus horn that caused us all to jump out of our skins, we arrived in our compound in St. Ard.

Despite our dragging feet, right away we got to work, unloading and unpacking luggage to remove medicine. We also unloaded medicine and food from the shipping container sent ahead a couple months ago. As if we’d been working together for twenty-four days instead of less than twenty-four hours, we worked as a team to organize and set up the pharmacy and the kitchen. We also took tours of the clinic facilities within the compound, oohing and ahhing over the new dental equipment provided by Paul, one of our team members. Seriously, chairs that lean back. So at least during the clinic in this compound, we won’t have to hold patients’ heads during their dental procedures. We also got a look at the brand new prosthetics center that was just built and is in the process of getting going.

Amazing stuff, guys.

The heat is tolerable, not the sticky rice kind, but the overwhelming dry roast kind as you as you stand in the sun. But we quickly acclimated. Mostly, because of these guys.

Already, Haiti has stolen our hearts.

Can you tell?

Deep Thoughts on the Eve of Departure

2012-01-19T01:21:00.000-05:00

Okay, so I'm leaving for Haiti today (Thursday). I had originally planned on vlogging my thoughts tonight. But somehow time has gotten away from me. It's already almost one AM, and I have to be up in six hours.

So. No vlog. But I will tell you this:

I'm kind of scared.

Like if you told me I didn't have to go, I'd probably consider it.

Leaving my family?

Blah.

That's got me so down. I had a moment at my Little Bean's school today, volunteering in the library, when I just broke down, you know? It just hit me. I'm leaving for Haiti. There's nothing easy about that.

But I'm excited, too. For all the obvious reasons, not the least of which is the children we'll be surrounded by because of the orphanage. But this just hit me today too--I'm about to get to know twenty-four people I didn't really know before. Good people. With big huge hearts. Some of them medical with healing abilities (Amen to that, baby), and many of them like me--no medical knowledge, but a need to heal anyway. A part of me is just a tad insecure, wondering if they'll like me. Think I'm an idiot. Or weak. But mostly, I'm just excited to get to know them. I wonder, too, if they're feeling the same way, or if it's just a newbie feeling? Or just me? It's sort of like a writers' conference, in that respect...if I were going on my very first one. In the poorest country in the Western hemisphere...

I have no idea if I'll have Internet access in Haiti. I hope so. Hubs is still working on my phone, trying to get it all sorted. But I'll attempt to blog tomorrow (today, technically) from the airport. If nothing else, I'd like you to see the people I'm traveling with. I'm convinced they're special people. I think you'll see that, too.

But, for now, let me catch you up:

This is the medicine I collected and purchased. It's hard to tell here, but you're looking at thousands upon thousands of tablets and bottles, ointments, and drops.

But it wasn't all me. In fact, I did very little of this. Honestly, it was all you guys. Every one of you who donated, helped break down meds, prayed, sent happy juju, encouraged, and all around lifted me and the team up--dude, it was YOU. You are the foundation of this Medical Team. Without you, there is no team. FYI.

I wish I'd gotten a picture of all the medicine when it was spread out as we were preparing to pack it. But I didn't get my camera out until most of it had been scooped up. Even then, it was only a portion, as a lot had been shipped in advance. But oh man. Seriously. I was blown away by the amount of medicine. A veritable Garden of Healing. Freaking awesome. What you see above was just a small percentage.

Here's Dana, our Team pharmacist and Carolyn on the right, Nurse and Team Coordinator. Without these two, the Team would sink. Clearly, they are AWEsome. And I adore them already. Those meds you see are all that was left after the initial shark feeding frenzy, aka packing up grab and go (I make this sound way simpler than it was).

Here we have Dr. Mark (aka Duck), Paul, Dr. Lee, and...I want to say Tom, but only because that's what his name tag appears to say. I'm not entirely sure who this is yet, or if he's going. There were a number of people helping at the packing party who weren't actually going. I'll let you know later if Tom went. He does seem very nice. Duck, by the way, is the guy who is responsible for Mission Haiti Medical. Like, THE GUY. We owe him a lot ("Duck" is a sign of respect. I promise. Story to come later.)

Here's some more packing up. I'm not sure about the two ladies' names. They seem lovely, but I didn't catch their names. I'll let you know about them later. I know the guy, though. That's Pastor Dave, who, by the way, is also resident photographer. His pictures will be much better than mine.

He gives excellent advice. Because of him, this trip is a little easier for me. I also have a secret name for him...

P.Diddy. But don't tell him.

Here you have a piece of luggage getting weighed. It happens to be my luggage, actually. A little medicine. But mostly make-up (cue snort). It's important we get the luggage all the way to the max 50 pounds. No leaving medicine behind! The guy with the beard belongs to me. I'm not sure about the guy without the beard. But if he's on the trip, I'll find out. And let you know. He does seem quite nice.

And here's me, packing my carry-on, which my husband got up to 60 pounds. HELLO. Apparently, he thinks I'm Hercules. It's now a solid forty pounds, thanks to Carolyn's daughter (whose name escapes me at the moment. It's possible it wasn't Carolyn's daughter either. So. Hm.)

I'm really hoping people will fill me in on these names. Just a newbie here, people.

Anyway, if there's one thing I hope you take away from this is not really how much work is involved in doing a medical mission like this (that's a given--but also really difficult to convey). But rather, I hope you see how it takes a lot of people to make something like this happen. This is just a small sampling of the people involved. We have twenty-five people actually traveling to Haiti, but just imagine how many people were needed to support each and every one of the twenty-five. For me, one of the most overwhelming aspects of this whole thing was the notion that I'm just one person. How much difference can I possibly make? And how in the world can I do this alone?

But we're not alone. That's what I'm coming to understand. That's what we hope the Haitians will take away, too. For starters.

Look at My Big Lips Under the Never Sky

2012-01-10T02:39:00.003-05:00

UNDER THE NEVER SKY by Veronica Rossi

Goodreads Summary:
WORLDS KEPT THEM APART.

DESTINY BROUGHT THEM TOGETHER.

Aria has lived her whole life in the protected dome of Reverie. Her entire world confined to its spaces, she's never thought to dream of what lies beyond its doors. So when her mother goes missing, Aria knows her chances of surviving in the outer wasteland long enough to find her are slim.

Then Aria meets an outsider named Perry. He's searching for someone too. He's also wild - a savage - but might be her best hope at staying alive.

If they can survive, they are each other's best hope for finding answers.

Not sure I could quite get across just how excited I am about this book! Love the premise, and what bits I've read of it already have me so excited, I suspect this will be one of those I'll struggle to put down while I'm at the dinner table. There's just something about outsider stories that really draws me in. I think, maybe, because so much of my life, I've felt like an outsider, never quite fitting in no matter where I was. Sometimes I wonder if we all feel this way. A little? Ohhhhh, I sense a blog post in the making...

Anyway, I wanted to tell you, first, it's out now! I just got a copy of it. And despite how busy I am (perhaps you've noticed I haven't posted in a million years?), I'm squeezing this sucker in.

And second, I wanted to wish Veronica a hearty congratulations!!!

<3 <3 Congratulations!!! <3 <3

If you haven't picked up a copy yet, you can check it out HERE.

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On another note, I'm still around. Sort of. I'm finishing up a major project, while also trying to prepare for my Haiti trip, which has turned out to be much greater of an undertaking than I anticipated. Thus, something in my life has to get the shaft while I focus on these two very important things. As I'm reluctant to let the victim be my family, it's had to be my online activity.

I do miss you guys, though. But don't worry. I shall not forget what you look like, or the sound of your voice. I will try to post a couple of times before I leave, and then hopefully, I can blog from Haiti. That's the plan anyway. And after Haiti, well. Maybe we can have a little chat. Some tea, perhaps? A couple glasses of wine?

Miss me, miss me. Now you gotta kiss me.

P.S. Dude. I collected about $1100 for this medical mission!!!! How amazing, no? I owe it all to you guys! Tomorrow, I'll be making my final medicine purchase, several thousand prenatal vitamins. It's unbelievable how much medicine there is, you guys. All of it has to be broken down into small bags, too (of 7, 14, and 30, depending on the medicine)--this is a HUGE amount of work, so I've had to enlist some help (I used CAPS and italics in case you weren't sure how huge). But as you can imagine, getting help requires work, too, as I have to prepare the medicines, bags, and labels, and then instruct people what to do. But it will all be worth it. I can't wait to post the pictures just of all the medicine. It's freaking astounding. I <3 you guys, and all the support you've shown.

Seriously. Whenever I have a rough day, I think about this. About you guys. You renew my faith.

Cover Reveal: IF I LIE by Corrine Jackson; Also, Watch me Ramble

2011-12-21T03:30:00.003-05:00

IF I LIE by Corrine Jackson

Summary:

A powerful debut novel about the gray space between truth and perception.

Quinn’s done the unthinkable: she kissed a guy who is not Carey, her boyfriend. And she got caught. Being branded a cheater would be bad enough, but Quinn is deemed a traitor, and shunned by all of her friends. Because Carey’s not just any guy—he’s serving in Afghanistan and revered by everyone in their small, military town.

Quinn could clear her name, but that would mean revealing secrets that she’s vowed to keep—secrets that aren’t hers to share. And when Carey goes MIA, Quinn must decide how far she’ll go to protect her boyfriend…and her promise.

A simple cover, but stunning, no? So sad and moving, isn't it? The way she stands behind him, holding on to him, and yet, not looking at him? Even the fact that he's got his back turned to her...it's pain on display. Maybe also longing? IF I LIE sounds like a gorgeous story. I'm looking forward to reading it. But I wonder, too, what it will make me think about. How it might make me dig deep.

Because we all keep secrets, don't we? Some of them big, some small. Some happy, and others...not so happy. And then there's those that we're ashamed of. Or those we keep for others. This story in particular deals with a secret that is not a secret this girl can share because it doesn't belong to her. But there are apparently serious ramifications in her life to keep this secret. Which does, of course, beg the questions: how much is friendship worth? Indeed, how much is a promise worth? How much should we be expected to sacrifice for the promises we make?

Just this evening, Little Bean came crying to me that her big sister broker her promise to her. "She promised she'd play Mario with me, and now she won't do it." It breaks my heart to see her so upset, so sad (even if her big sister didn't actually promise anything more than a "maybe"). A broken promise can feel so harsh. It's like saying you kind of don't respect that person or care about them nearly as much as you made it seem when you made the promise.

Or, I suppose, maybe most of us don't take promises all that seriously. Maybe that's why we've invented the pinky swear. Or the swearing on Bibles and mother's graves and warts on the end of grandma's nose. Because we don't trust that a promise alone means jack bupkis.

So, okay, this is one of the reasons I'm really intrigued with IF I LIE. Because I want to see how far a person will go to keep a vow she's made, even if that promise will come back to bite her in the knickers. No, actually, I want to see at what point I will be like, enough already, just tell. Because, maybe that's at the point that I would just tell. And, really, I'd like to get the sense of where I stand in that kind of thing.

Here's the thing. I'm a Secret Keeper. I didn't used to be, but I am now. Like for real. Practically magic. (Unless I've had a bit too much vodka, in which case, that's the time to hit me up). But I don't feel compelled to share people's secrets naturally (especially my own). Gossip sucks arse, for one thing. And to be honest, if it's not vital to my own life, I tend to forget stuff . I'm vain that way. BUT. What if keeping that secret hurt me in some way? Maybe then it really would depend on how much I loved you, you sorry arsed friend, making me keep your secrets when they're hurting me. At what point would I abandon you? Would I? Would I be a sucker for keeping mum?

I don't have any answers, obviously. That's one of the many reasons I enjoy reading books like IF I LIE. I'm all about the cheap therapy.

I've also heard the writing in IF I LIE is brilliant and the story just beautiful. So there's that. I'm really excited about this one.

IF I LIE's expected release date is August 28, 2012 from Simon Pulse. FYI, if you read the Goodreads summary, you'll get a slightly different explanation, which will make you want to read this even more. Also, if you go there, you can add it as "To-Read.")

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Be sure to check out what the other Bookanistas are highlighting for you today!

Elana Johnson adores EVERNEATH

Shelli Johannes-Wells and Carolina Valdez Miller have cover love for IF I LIE

A Holiday 2 ARC Giveaway

2011-12-20T10:51:00.001-05:00

Please forgive me the short, virtually contentless post. I'm fighting strep and attempting to prepare for Christmas. In lieu of real content, I come bearing gifts. Happy holidays...

Soooo...

I've got two beautiful ARCs I'm giving away. Super cute and entertaining--and brilliant concepts. TEMPEST is a wild ride back in time, full of action. DITCHED is romantic and funny, a lighthearted, enjoyable read. Have a look and see if you're interested in winning one of these books, both of them just perfect for winter holiday reading.

TEMPEST by Julie Cross

Goodreads: The year is 2009. Nineteen-year-old Jackson Meyer is a normal guy… he’s in college, has a girlfriend… and he can travel back through time. But it’s not like the movies – nothing changes in the present after his jumps, there’s no space-time continuum issues or broken flux capacitors – it’s just harmless fun.

That is… until the day strangers burst in on Jackson and his girlfriend, Holly, and during a struggle with Jackson, Holly is fatally shot. In his panic, Jackson jumps back two years to 2007, but this is not like his previous time jumps. Now he’s stuck in 2007 and can’t get back to the future.

Desperate to somehow return to 2009 to save Holly but unable to return to his rightful year, Jackson settles into 2007 and learns what he can about his abilities.

But it’s not long before the people who shot Holly in 2009 come looking for Jackson in the past, and these “Enemies of Time” will stop at nothing to recruit this powerful young time-traveler. Recruit… or kill him.

Piecing together the clues about his father, the Enemies of Time, and himself, Jackson must decide how far he’s willing to go to save Holly… and possibly the entire world.

DITCHED by Robin Mellom

Goodreads: High school senior Justina Griffith was never the girl who dreamed of going to prom. Designer dresses and strappy heels? Not her thing. So she never expected her best friend, Ian Clark, to ask her.

Ian, who always passed her the baseball bat handle first.

Ian, who knew exactly when she needed red licorice.

Ian, who promised her the most amazing night at prom.

And then ditched her.

Now, as the sun rises over her small town, and with only the help of some opinionated ladies at the 7-Eleven, Justina must piece together — stain by stain on her thrift-store dress — exactly how she ended up dateless. A three-legged Chihuahua was involved. Along with a demolition derby-ready Cadillac. And there was that incident at the tattoo parlor. Plus the flying leap from Brian Sontag's moving car...

But to get the whole story, Justina will have to face the boy who ditched her. And discover if losing out at prom can ultimately lead to true love.

Filled with humor, charm, and romance, Ditched: A Love Story by debut novelist Robin Mellom will have readers dreaming of love on their own prom nights.

CLICK HERE to enter the TWO ARC International Giveaway: TEMPEST and DITCHED

This giveaway is international and ends Wednesday, December 28, midnight EST. You must be 13 years old to enter. If you win, you will need to provide an address for shipment. Under 18's must have parent/guardian permission to enter, and obviously, to give me your address if you win.

Thanks so much for entering, and good luck!

THIS GIVEAWAY HAS ENDED. PLEASE SEE WINNERS BELOW.

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GO HERE to see the winner of WHY WE BROKE UP by Daniel Handler

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WINNERS OF A HOLIDAY 2 ARC GIVEAWAY

TEMPEST by Julie Cross

Carina O.

DITCHED by Robin Mellom

Kare

Congratulations, Carina and Kare! Please email me an address to which I can ship your books. Thanks so much to all who entered. I hope to post another giveaway soon!

A Real Letter to Santa, and an ARC Giveaway

2011-12-19T09:28:00.001-05:00

Second Grader:

Dear Santa,

Are you real? My friend Haylee doesn't believe you. But I believe you. If your not real please don't tell me. By the way I've been wanting a cat. The kind my mom is not alergic to. They make her look red and pretty ugly and she would be very mad with me if I asked for a cat that made her like that. Make it the not alergic kind but not the bald kind. Those are very strainge. Also maybe let it snow this year and then I would like a sled. Is it really cold there. Do you have to wear gloves all the time inside even when you go to the bathroom. That would be very hard I bet. I will leave you cookies but please eat the hole thing and not just one bit that is wastefull okay. Thank you for all the good things you do like take presents everywhere to all the children. That is so nice and I would like that all the so much. If your not real who is eating the one bite of cookie every year. I have been wondering that. Amen.

Your friend,

[Redacted]

Mine:

Dear Santa Baby,

I've been wanting a house elf. One who will cook and clean and magic me out of tricky situations. Please send the kind that also takes care of email and can change the curse word in my head into something socially acceptable before it leaves my mouth. I've been having a problem with both of these things. Also, I would like smaller thumbs so that I don't have to text with one finger and look an idiot (you can also bring me a phone with larger numbers--that will do just as well). While you're at it, please bring me a pair of jeans that make my ass look nice and twenty-something (this is where I could've used that house elf--for the cursing, not the ass lifting, unless house elves do that, in which case, let's kill two birds).

And because you are Santa and I believe in you unlike some people I know (you really need to stop bringing them gifts, you know), I will also add that I would like you to make my book into a movie starring Jared Leto circa 1996 but with a slightly updated hairdo. I realize this will involve some tricky time-travel maneuvers and probably a super expensive hair stylist, but you are magic and I believe in you. Also, I need you to bring me some more Moroccan Oil because my hair will look like cat vomit once I run out. Also do not forget I need new blush because I dropped mine and it busted into tiny pieces that cling to the brush in clumps and this makes a mess on my cheeks that causes people to wonder if I am feverish and leprosied. I know you understand.

While you're at it, please bring me the ability to foresee what children are sick in my daughter's class so that when I have lunch at her school, I will know who to not sit by right before they vomit (would've been nice last Friday). Also, I could use a few more bottles of hand sanitizer, thanks. FYI, the Japanese Cherry Blossom scent is quite nice.

And before I go, I'm still wanting the following:

18, 00 Tablets of Children's chewable ACETAMINOPHEN

3,000 tablets of children's chewable IBUPROFEN

36, 000 tablets of Children's chewable VITAMINS
44,000 tablets of adult's MULTI-VITAMINS

16,000 tablets of ANTACIDS

5000 tablets of AMOXICILLIN

If you'd like to bring some Diflucan, maybe a bit of Levaquin and Zithromax (say, 100 or 500 units, awesome!), and also some ibuprofen because my throat hurts. I will leave you cookies, but please understand there will likely be a bite taken out of every one. This is customary in my culture.

Finally, I'd like to make a special request...please bring lovely gifts to all the customs personnel in Port Au Prince, Haiti. Make them really, really happy, k--enough joy to last for a long time? We would like to get through with our bags of drugs without having to get too close and personal. If you know what I mean.

Feel free to take the trash to the curb on your way out. You're a peach. Amen.

Yours in Dutiful Belief,
Carol

P.S. You are real, right?

*****************

So, I can't seem to figure out how to update the stats on Medical Mission to Haiti picture. Not quickly anyway. I'll work on it today. But...we've collected like a thousand dollars!! So stoked. This has gone a long way so far. Thank you to all of you who spread the word, prayed, encouraged me, wished really hard, sent me some maja ju-ju happies, and donated. I am so very grateful for all of you. And so blessed to know you. You guys are just amazing.

I will be continuing to collect until January 13 (January 15, we pack up all the meds). Just wait until you see the pictures of the packing. It'll be wild. I'll try to post those before I go.

*****************

GO HERE to see the winner of the signed copy of HERE by Denise Grover Swank. Congratulations to the winner! Thank you for entering!

*****************

Guess what? I have a copy of this ARC burning a hole in my bookshelf:

WHY WE BROKE UP by Daniel Handler

It's super cute, but also really touching, you know? And frustrating because what's done is done is done and you just can't go back. A must-read for anyone who's ever faced a teenage breakup (go on, raise your hand.) The writing is artsy and different and beautiful, much like its main character. There's artwork throughout the book which is quite relevant to the story itself. And guess what? I want to give this book away. Like today. So you can get it by Christmas.

SO. If you'd like me to send this to you...

ENTER HERE to win an ARC of WHY WE BROKE UP

This giveaway is international and ends TONIGHT, December 19, midnight EST. You must be 13 years old to enter. If you win, you will need to provide an address for shipment. Under 18's must have parent/guardian permission to enter.

Obviously, if you are an international entrant and you win, you probably won't get this by Christmas. And there are no guarantees I can actually get this to you by Christmas even in the US because we all know how fickle the Post Office is. Maybe Boxing Day. Or New Year's, if you're the winner and slow to respond. Or by your pet chihuahua's next birthday. But I will send it out tomorrow, or as soon as the winner gives me an address. Check back tomorrow to see if you've won.

As always, thank you for entering and being all around supreme. Come back tomorrow, okay? Even if you didn't win, I've got another super cool 2 ARC giveaway I'll be posting.

THIS GIVEAWAY IS NOW CLOSED. THANK YOU TO ALL WHO ENTERED!

The winner of WHY WE BROKE UP by Daniel Handler is:

Holly L.

Congratulations, Holly! Please contact me with an address to which I can ship your book. Thanks so much, all of you who entered. I'm posting a different 2 ARC giveaway today!

Buy a Book, Save an Endangered Animal...PICK THE CHIMPANZEE

2011-12-13T02:44:00.000-05:00

A special edition of Heather McCorkle’s The Secret Of Spruce Knoll is releasing from Compass Press this month and she’s doing a special tour to go along with it. The special part, a percentage of the proceeds from every special edition sold (in every format) between its release date and 12-12-2012, will go toward Heather’s favorite charity that protects endangered species. Her goal is to make at least $10,000 for the charity.

So, I super love this whole concept. A great book just in time for the holidays and a cause worth supporting--killing two birds with one stone (ok, not a good analogy here)*.

Of course there are prizes during the tour which goes from December 1^st through the 17^th. Prizes include a symbolic endangered species adoption of the winner’s choice (a $50 donation by Heather to the charity for the endangered species of the winner’s choice, and cute stuffed animal for the winner!), signed copies of her novels and great swag. For full details, and to enter, go here.

For the tour Heather has asked each blog host to pick their favorite endangered species and she will tell us a fun or interesting fact about that animal.

I've chosen the chimpanzee. For obvious reasons.

Oh my gosh. So. freaking. adorable.

Note to winner: PICK THE CHIMPANZEE!!!

Heather: I must be honest, monkeys give me the creeps. I won't even go to their exhibits at the zoo. *shudders* Don't ask me why, maybe it's the poo-slinging. ;)

Carol: The poo-slinging is the best part. Come on. That's awesome. They're like people except they're free to do everything politically incorrect (and horribly unsanitary, but whatever.)

Eh hmm...I'll let Heather explain why chimps need our support.

Heather: Chimps used to be found in 25 African countries, but sadly, now they are extinct in three of those countries and are near-extinct in four more due to deforestation and hunting.

Carol: The thought of these little guys not being around any more...it breaks my heart. So, please...do yourself a favor and pick up a copy of The Secret of Spruce Knoll for some sweet reading and save an animal today. And also, PICK THE CHIMPANZEE.

Buy links for the eBooks:

The Secret of Spruce Knoll on Amazon.Com

The Secret of Spruce Knoll on Barnes and Noble

****************

Also, if you haven't yet entered to win a signed copy of HERE by Denise Grover Swank, you can still do so by going here. Giveaway ends this Friday, December 16.

*I don't kill birds, fyi--not the real, non-metaphorical ones. Once, when I was ten, as we were walking to school, my best friend Luis threw a stone that killed a bird, and I wouldn't talk to him for days, even though he felt really bad and swore he'd never do it again. It was very sad for me, and I have never forgotten how I felt that day.

Although now I kind of have a thing with birds. They creep me out a little. I'm not sure why. Hitchcock, maybe.

But chimpanzees are cool. PICK THE CHIMPANZEE.

TATTERED Takes Over My Blog and Offers You a Chance to Win a Kindle Fire

2011-12-11T02:32:00.011-05:00

A couple of years ago, I picked up MISFIT MCCABE by LK Gardner-Griffie, this book with a spunky looking girl on the cover, thinking Hmm. I don't normally read books like this, see, ones intended as younger YA. But then I just whipped through MISFIT MCCABE, and by the end I totally adored the fiery, trouble-making, but totally lovable Katie McCabe. Well, it turns out that MISFIT was just the first in the series. So of course, I picked up the sequel NOWHERE FEELS LIKE HOME, and enjoyed it just as much. TATTERED, the third in the series, has just been released, and after a short reading hiatus, I'm looking forward to digging into it this week. But for now, I'd like to welcome Gardner-Griffie on my blog for the last stop of her blog tour to tell you all a little bit about this new book and this kicking series of hers (which, FYI, would make a perfect holiday gift for your tween/teen).

ALSO? You can win a Kindle Fire. Just saying. So, read on, friends, as I turn my blog over to Miss GG and the little spitfire better known as Katie McCabe.

*********************

LK: First of all, I'd like to thank Carolina Valdez Miller for hosting the Tattered tour.
(Carol says: You're welcome, mate.)

For today's prize of a paperback copy of Misfit McCabe along with The Prophecy of Zephyrus by G. A. Hesse AND an ARC of Tattered, simply comment on this post.
To get a free ebook copy of Misfit McCabe:

Put together the puzzle and write down the code. Each day will give another part of the coupon code. Please note at the top whether it is for eBook or Print.
Once you have collected the entire code, go to Smashwords and purchase Misfit McCabe input the code and download whichever ebook version you need for free.

To get 50% off the print version of Misfit McCabe:

Put together the puzzle and write down the code. Each day will give another part of the coupon code. Please note at the top whether it is for eBook or Print.
Once you have collected the entire code, go to Griffie World Store and purchase Misfit McCabe input the code and receive 50% off the purchase price.

To win the KINDLE FIRE

Support this tour by commenting on each of the daily stops -- It's only 11 days, not even as long as the 12 days of Christmas.
And if you're under 18 and would like to enter, but don't have Facebook or Twitter, etc. if you have a friend comment on the posts saying that you sent them, we'll consider that your entry for the Grand Prize. One friend for each stop (and they can enter too and bring all of their friends to the party).

Tattered is the third novel in the heartwarming young adult series, Misfit McCabe. A little about the book:

What do Sunday afternoon court proceedings, cheerleader tryouts, and a book burning have in common? Katie McCabe is back in action.

After her nemesis Harvey is found guilty and sentenced to community service, Katie wants to believe her troubles are over, but Harvey won’t rest until he gets revenge. When blackmail rears its ugly head, she’s caught between friends and enemies putting her growing relationship with Tom at stake. Books go up in flames and Katie’s world rains down in tatters.

I know that everyone knows by now, but I'll say it anyway. I met Carol on Twitter as part of a rebel NaNoWriMo writing group. For those who just went NaNo-What??? NaNoWriMo stands for National Novel Writing Month and takes place every November. The gist is start November 1st and crank out 50 thousand words by the end of November 30th. But that's not what we're here to talk about. Through Twitter we got to know one another and then I was excited to meet her in person, first when she came to Los Angeles for a writing conference, and then we became fellow Bling Babes at a conference in Denver. Oh and if you ever have her caramel puffs, you're never going back. #justsayin' (Carol's note: They're mostly sugar and butter, so...yeah, they're pretty awesome). Now I'll turn things over to Katie McCabe, the fourteen-year-old main character of Tattered.

Katie: Hi Carol! Thanks for having me today. Before I get started, I heard you're going on a medical mission to Haiti in January. I think that is awesome. You are so brave and I'm proud to know you.
(Carol says: Awww, shucks. *Tries to think of something humble to say, but ends up sounding ungracious and self-deprecating, so just says, "THANK YOU.")

Okay... Tattered. Today, I really don't have someone to talk about, I mean, I could. There are more people, but we're going to end with the story itself. I really didn't know what to say. Some people have told me my life is a bit like a soap opera. I get it. I really do. Orphaned at fourteen, abducted, injured, bitten by a rattler, living with strangers, there's an evil town leader who has a vendetta against the family and his evil son who believes in dangerous retribution, my best friend's dad is in a coma, and he's the one who put him there, the outcast Goth who hated me for no reason, the perky cheerleader who has designs on my boyfriend, the lunatics who want to burn the town's books, the mystery of Mamma's death overshadowing everything, my cousin's engaged, but then an old flame turns up... it just keeps going on and on. Of the seven McCabe boys who grew up here, Uncle Charley is the only one left. I've heard rumors that HL Denton, the disgusting Harvey's father, drove them all out of town. I don't see how that's possible, but the Denton's and the McCabe's seem to be involved in some sort of battle. It's kinda weird though, when HL showed up drunk on our doorstep, threatening us -- especially me -- Uncle Charley didn't call the cops. Instead he had Sarah call HL's wife, Harriet who fired Sarah from her job over the evil toad, Harvey. You know that's the last call Sarah wanted to make. And from what I can make out from some of the dinner conversation, HL tries to sabotage Uncle Charley's construction business at every turn. And he swindled Uncle Jake out of some of the family property a long time ago, and forced Sarah's parents out of business, but Uncle Charley didn't turn him in when he had the chance. *muses* Is it because they were boys together?

And HL seems to hate me. The only time he was even half-way nice to me was the first time I met him, but ever since I had my run-in with Harvey, he can't stand me. It scares me when he looks at me, so I've been really glad that Uncle Charley and Sarah have been with me when he's been around. He gives me the heebs. And all because his precious son *gag* is too stupid to realize you can't get away with everything in life just because your dad owns everything in town. And Uncle Charley warned me to stay away from him because of something about Daddy, but he didn't tell me what. Not that I need any warning to stay away after he screamed at me and told me I had to lie about what his son did.

So yeah... I get it. The whole soap opera aspect. But this isn't a soap opera.

It's my life.

LK: Put the puzzle below together for part of the code to receive 50% off a paperback of Misfit McCabe. This is the last stop of this tour. Thanks to everyone for participating. I'm going to leave comments open through 12/13/11 to give everyone a chance to catch up if they just caught the tour today and all the winners will be announced on 12/14/11 at Griffie World. For all details on the tour, the prizes, and the stops, please visit Griffie World.

If the puzzle does not load correctly, please refresh your browser and it should display correctly. And if for some reason it still does not display correctly, click this link to open the puzzle in a new browser window.

Bookanista Review of HERE by Denise Grover Swank + Signed Giveaway

2011-12-08T02:30:00.029-05:00

It's been too long since I discussed books. Or gave anything away. So, I 'm back with that. Giveaway entry is at the bottom.

*Dances the Roger Rabbit*

HERE by Denise Grover Swank

Summary: Sixteen year old Julia Phillips buries herself in guilt after killing her best friend Monica in a car accident. Julia awoke in the hospital with a broken leg, a new talent for drawing and false memories of the accident, in which she dies and Monica lives. The doctors attribute this to her head injury, but no one can explain how a bracelet engraved with her name ended up at the scene of the accident. A bracelet no one has ever seen before.
Classmate Evan Whittaker paid Julia no attention before the accident, let alone after. Now suddenly he’s volunteering to tutor her and offering to drive her home. She can't ignore that his new obsession started after his two-day disappearance last week and that he wears a pendant she’s been drawing for months. When the police show up one night looking for Evan, he begs Julia to run with him, convincing her that Monica is still alive. Julia agrees to go, never guessing where he’s really from.

MY REVIEW

I got all set to talk about the coolest, most awesome thing I loved most about this book, and then last minute I read the summary as I was pasting it from Goodreads, and CRUD. It's not even mentioned. Which means if I talk about it, I will be spoiling it for everybody. Dang it dang it dang it.

Okay, so, fresh approach, avoiding the coolest thing which answers "never guessing where he's really from."

So, obviously, HERE is a mystery. Eh hem. It's also a romance, but it's special in a certain regard, which I can't talk about because that's also not mentioned, and that would be giving away something quite major. Hm...

The amazing thing is, even with so much of the story being a complete surprise (and those surprises being some of most memorable aspects of the book), the summary itself is really compelling even without those spoilers. That should give you an idea of what to expect from HERE.

(I totally just talked in circles--but bear with me.)

So let's focus on non-spoiler things. Like Julia. She's emotional, a little lost, suffering from intense survivor's guilt. The amazing thing is that Julia still manages to come across as a three dimensional character with a well rounded personality; she's not just 'the depressed character." She's got issues outside of the death of her friend Monica. Like her parents. And school. Lack of self confidence. And eerie occurrences (this is where the story elevates to a higher, more intense level). It's got a bit of a science fiction flare, but very accessible, with teen drama that makes the fantasy of it still feel really relatable. Swank captures well that angst that seems to drive teenage existence without overwhelming the reader with it.

It's easy to get carried away with HERE, to just rush through the pages. It's filled with tension that drives you forward, propelling you headfirst into the fantasy element without you even realizing it's happening. It's quite a genre buster--a story that feels like a YA romantic mystery, but it pulls elements from history, sort of...bending them...while throwing in some SF/F that ultimately shapes the mystery into a thriller.

I really like genre busters, so this is awesome.

HERE is cool and different from so much of the YA that is out there now, though I predict we'll see more books like this in the next year or two. Unfortunately, I cannot tell you how it's different without ruining it for you. Just trust me on this.

******************

Win a Signed copy of HERE by Denise Grover Swank

Hey, guess what? After some pleading and serious whining, I managed to procure a signed copy of Denise's book to give away. Cool, huh? All you have do is fill in your name and email on this form:

Enter HERE to win a Signed HERE by Denise Grover Swank

This giveaway is international and ends Friday, December 16, midnight EST. You must be 13 years old to enter. If you win, you will need to provide an address for shipment. Under 18's must have parent/guardian permission to enter.

Thanks so much for entering and commenting and being all around supreme. Oh, and if you just can't wait to see if you won and would like to pick up a copy of HERE for yourself, check it out on Amazon or Barnes and Noble. But enter anyway. Cuz it's signed.

OH, and come back again because I've got some more surprises for you guys. You realize I haven't done giveaways in like a million years? Let's remedy that. Tomorrow maybe? (Sorry, I'm not trying to be vague--I just never know if I'll find time to do this stuff.)

THIS GIVEAWAY IS NOW CLOSED. PLEASE SEE BELOW FOR THE WINNER.

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Be sure to check out what the other Bookanistas are highlighting today!

Elana Johnson roars for FURY
Shannon Whitney Messenger marvels at A MILLION SUNS plus a preorder giveaway
Carolina Valdez Miller is all about HERE with giveaway
Gretchen McNeil twirls for AUDITION
Corrine Jackson hails THE CATASTROPHIC HISTORY OF ME AND YOU
Stasia Ward Kehoe is wild for DON’T BREATHE A WORD
Katy Upperman gets in the spirit with ELF ON A SHELF

Nikki Katz dishes on WHY WE BROKE UP

Okay, so this is really weird. I can't figure out why all the names except Nikki's are all white. I tried to fix it and ended up with something weirder than this, so white background it is. Sorry.

**********************

And the winner of HERE by Denise Grover Swank is

Kate A. E.

Congratulations, Kate! Please contact me with an address to which I can send your book.

Thank you so much to all who entered! More giveaways coming up!

The Year of Suck and Awesome

2011-12-07T06:01:00.005-05:00

I told myself that the next time I posted, it would be something funny and semi-irreverent, something old-school Carol and totally inane.

And then I got the news that we'd had a death in the family. That two people I love very much had just suffered a very tragic, very devastating, unexpected loss.

Things were kind of tough for a while. Less for me than for others. But.

I was still so sad, you know?

So. I haven't posted. I made lasagna instead. Like a stupidhead. Like that fixes a damn thing. Like their freezer wasn't already packed full of food.

Then yesterday, I went out by myself. Sat in my car in a parking lot listening to the windshield wipers going swish swash, swish swash. I rested my head on the steering wheel and watched headlights pass by.

Eventually, my thoughts turned from the funeral to my children. How Bigger Bean said to me the other day, "I'm glad you're not like other moms." How Little Bean likes to brush my hair with lotion and reach into my coat pockets digging for Hershey Kisses. How my radio is almost always set to Radio Disney and how my calendar is jam packed with my children's names and how there's almost always a light on in my house or noise to remind me how not alone I am.

Right around the time I remembered my children laughing about their creative alterations to the lyrics of Jingle Bells, I realized: 2011 is not The Year of Suck. It is merely 2011, in which Suck happened right along with Awesome. Here's the epiphany I had:

Suck can only outweigh Awesome if I press a thumb to Suck's scale.

So. I chose: happiness. And then I went home.

2012, be there suck or awesome, I'm going to be happy then, too.

*************

P.S. Here's a bunch of other stuff.

Dude. I'm on Inky Fresh Press. Bridgid Gallagher, editor and founder of IFP, interviewed me, asking really pointed questions about my upcoming trip to Haiti. Some of those questions were super hard to answer. Some of them...uncomfortable? But also awesome. It wasn't until this interview that I really even had an inkling of why. Or even stopped to think about how it all came about. If you're curious, wondering WTF someone like me is even going to do in a medical work camp in Haiti...and what I hope to accomplish there, well, go visit Inky Fresh Press. It's all there, all the stuff I didn't post in my Haiti blog post.

But don't check out Inky Fresh Press just for my interview. See what Bridgid and others have to say about writing and publishing. They also host author interviews and giveaways--and they're currently looking for guest bloggers for next year. Cool, yeah? Go go go!

AND

MAJOR congratulations are in order for Amie Kaufman and Meagan Spooner on their pretty damn massive

book deal. Here--check it out (click on the image to see the full display).

WOOOO-HOOOOOO!! I'm a little late to wish them both well, but I hope they'll forgive me. Although I'd be just as thrilled for them even if they held a grudge (which they won't, because they're amazing). Can't wait to read this new series. Sounds supreme.

AND

MAJOR congratulations to Robin Bernstein Reul on her new agented status! Robin recently signed with Bill Contardi of Brandt & Hochman Literary. YES!! Way to go, Robin! Best wishes on this next leg of your publishing journey...

AND

MAJOR congratulations to Shelli Johannes-Wells (S.R. Johannes) on the release of her new YA UNTRACEABLE, which debuted at #10 on Amazon's Hot New ebook Releases. Fantastic! So happy for Shelli!

Okay, that's all for now. Come back tomorrow. I've got something for you.

This One's for the Discouraged

2011-11-23T02:30:00.003-05:00

Sunday morning I heard the news that some Indiana missionaries in Haiti were ambushed in the compound where they were residing. Armed robbers broke in, shot four of the missionaries and grazed another with a flyaway bullet. Yet another was injured jumping out of a second story window as he ran to get help.

The men survived, and the mission was not at all like the work camp I'll be a part of, but...still. You can imagine that my morning was...shaky. This had never even occurred to me as something that could happen to me while I'm working in Haiti. I spent a long time with my stomach in a hard ball, wondering WTF am I doing? Because, quite frankly, I feel so ill equipped to handle this sort of thing. I'm not a fighter, people. Confrontations of any kind turn me into pudding. I am that person that when given the wrong food order, I rarely send it back. The first time I had to go through one of those body scans at the airport, I was so shaken I could barely walk away, but did I say a word? Weak, people. I'm weak.

But strangely enough, I never considered not going to Haiti.

Haiti is one of the poorest nations in the world, still suffering from the aftereffects of the earthquake and poverty that seems to have no end. Haiti is not in a position where it can fully help itself right now, and I have been given an opportunity to do something for them. So, just as I would never turn my back on a someone I thought was being abused or neglected, I cannot turn my back on Haiti. Some things are worth the risk.

Am I afraid? Hell yeah. But if I allow myself to be frightened away from something I am meant to do--something beautiful and rewarding--because of some selfish (violent) jackholes, I will never forgive myself. And something remarkable will be lost.

But we do this all the time, don't we? I know I have, allowing myself to be scared off from something important because someone was cruel or because things got too tough. Seriously, all the time growing up. And even in my adult life I find myself doing this sometimes, backing down when really I should be all up in your grill. There have been times in my writing life, too, when someone has done/said something to discourage me, sometimes on purpose, sometimes not. It doesn't take much, though, to shake a writer's confidence. We're fragile creatures, naturally, our sense of identity so often tied to our writing.

How many of us have considered closing down our blogs because we feel so discouraged? How many of us have thought about abandoning social media altogether because, while it can bring us a little closer to the world, can also make us feel so vulnerable and exposed? How many of us have thought about hanging up our laptops because of endless and/or nasty rejections? Or because of something some other writer said/did? Or because we have never ever felt good enough? Perhaps we are cruelest to ourselves.

I'm not a strong person, not really. Not for myself. I know when it comes to my own children, I could probably rip out an assailant's throat in order to defend them (yeah, I know, thanks for the visual, Carol), but for me? Not so much.

But I'm tired of running. A friend of mine recently told me that I needed to work on self-love. It was a profound moment for me, and strangely ironic, because I love like mad. Passionately, with every ounce of my being. But loving myself...hm. I think, maybe, if I did, fully, I would fight for myself. I would tell the server to please remake my order (hold the spit); and I would never again think that my writing wasn't and could never be good enough. Most of us wouldn't blink twice at the thought of going to battle for our children, our pets, our parents or friends or even a stranger in need of help. But how many of us would fight for ourselves?

You owe it to yourself to hang on to the things that mean the most.* Don't let some jackhole (even if it's you) scare you away from what you're meant to do. While making others a priority is important, it's okay to love yourself enough. To love yourself a lot. It's okay--and necessary--to fight for yourself (read: your dreams).

NOTE: We will take all precautions necessary and will not take any unnecessary risks when traveling to Haiti. Though there hasn't been any discussion of cancelling our work camp, we will take seriously any warnings from the US Department of State of an increased threat in Haiti. The incident described above was an attempted robbery, a freak incident that could have just as easily occurred in the US or anywhere.

*By this I do not mean hoarding. Or stalking. Or resentments. Or hostages. Or your grandma's fruit cake. Or Garbage Pail Kids.

World Fantasy Convention 2011, with Pictures!

2011-11-18T02:30:00.014-05:00

Update: Look up! Do you see how much we've earned so far for Haiti??? Those of you who commented, tweeted, posted, Facebooked, and donated. This belongs to YOU. I'm so wowed, I don't even know what to say. I met my obligation and way more. Do you have any idea how much of a difference you've made already? HUGE.

*******************

I was going to post a review yesterday for Bookanista Thursday, but I've had so little sleep the last few days that I couldn't keep my eyes open. Also, I'm a bit flu-ish. Eh, it happens. So today I bring you a picture post, because that's easier to put together than a real post. So it goes like this:

October 25 I get to the hotel, which is like something out of a 1962 Doris Day movie, loaded with roses and separate bungalow-type weirdness (and a main hotel called the Towers...ohhhhh faaaancy) and stink weed (or was it skunk weed? I dunno, something stinky). And I settle into a hotel room with wallpaper straight out of my grandma's house circa 1982 and blue carpet and everything. It was awesome.

Anyway. Changed my stinky airplane clothes, registered for the con, and joined the gang for drinks at Charley's (the gang being a relative term).

On our left: Happy guy Griffin Barber ignoring my camera and the lovely Amber Van Dyk, who for our purposes we will now refer to as Marble.

On our right: Me, who looks airplane stinky, and sweet-pea Nancy Lambert, who does not. We are a happy pair, despite my stink. There were more people there, but I did not get pictures because I'm lame.

After that, several of us went downtown for breakfast. PS, this was the next morning. We took the "trolley" which is quite the misnomer, by.the.way. More like a crowded metro that does not even always stop at the normal stops but in the middle of nowhere. Ok, that was awesome too, frankly. We found this really crooked street that Awesome Blossom Sara McClung pointed to like whoaaaa.

Go with me on this.

And then Nancy was like, "Did you see that guy? He was all falling down that crooked street and stuff. Like this."

And then we went to this restaurant that served me possibly the worst boiled egg EVER. It was stinky and tasted like chicken poop. But the company was unforgettable and worth the egg.

And then we took a cab back because the trolley was not that awesome. I sat by the charming Jane Kindred and the cabby took the picture just before he almost killed us.

Just kidding. Enchanting LK Gardner-Griffie took the picture. But the cabby did almost kill us. True story. Then Sara and I changed rooms to THE TOWER. We wanted faaaaancy and also not to be in the boondocks.
Met up for soup (I'm the only one who had soup, technically) and took more pictures because that's what you do at conferences. See?

With Lovely Sara and Sweetie Shannon Messenger. Yay! And below: with my precious Holly McDowell, adorable Jessica Corra, and fabulous Brad Beaulieu. Yay us!

And even more Yay! With ever-pleasant Matt Rush.

With my roomie Hollyyyyyy who just arrived!!! And Saraaaaaaaa who I love to squishy squishhhhh!

We did so much fun stuff that night, but I'm keeping mum on that.

The next morning, we ended up getting Starbucks because the concierge guy sent us to a closed Cheesecake Factory.

Above: That's Jane beside the delightful Rae Carson, and on the right, peachy LK, super Rob Ziegler, sweetsie Sara and me in the cowboy outfit. After Starbucks, hello bellinis at Cheesecake Factory.

I will not bore you with the details of our wasted trip to yet another location (convenience store) that was closed, and move on to the evening activities.

At Charleys with Marble, Holly and loverly Marsha Siselak. Love them.

And then we had a drink or two. And then Holly and I exchanged shoes.

And then I met Jared Leto.

Okay. Fine. I'd had a little cider, so he looked probably more like Jared Leto then than now. He also had a really hot girlfriend with him.

So Matt goes: "Who are those beautiful people? Obviously not writers."

Because of course we writers are all ugly. It's the LAW.

Turns out, Jared was a paramedic (go on, tell me a good CPR joke). I didn't, um, ask about the girlfriend. So. Yeah.
(P.S. Anyone know who this is? Phone number, anyone? Anyone?)

The same night, with memorable Gra (pronounced Gray), Rob, Holly, and I have no idea who that person on the far left is, but she was lovely.

Next day, we went for sushi and had Thai food because the sushi place we were sent to was closed.
From left clockwise: Matt, Jessica, superest Simon Larter, Sara, me, Jane, and LK.

And in the evening, dinner with Shannon, sweeeet Kiersten White, Jane, LK, and Sara. Love these peeps (peops?)

Some stuff happened before that. Mostly meeting up with super cool Andrew Smith who I adore and dude, I met the adorable Victoria Schwab who I want to be. Alas, no pictures on my camera. I have a crap-ton of pictures with a lot of really fab people, though,which you will have to see on Facebook if you must. This post is getting looooong. Sadly, I also somehow neglected to get a picture with uber nice others I spent some time with and adored: Alexia Chamberlynn, Elena Solodow, Stephanie Loree, Elizabeth Briggs and Neil Gaiman. :( Actually, I didn't spend time with Neil--not sure why.

Here is me saying goodbye to San Diego by jumping into the fountain.

If it's not obvious, cons (especially WFC) are really just an excuse to tax deduct your vacation. See you next year in Toronto.

A Need

2011-11-15T00:19:00.000-05:00

Haiti medical team, 2011

Some of you probably already know that in January I'm volunteering to serve as part of a medical mission in Haiti. I know, I'm still a little shocked, too. Here I am, a non-medical person needed on a medical mission. Blows my mind. I couldn't really explain why I said yes. Or even all the steps that led to it. Everything just kind of...happened. But I can tell you how I feel. Most of the time, I'm excited and just can't wait to get out there.

Haitians waiting for medical care

But sometimes? I'm really, really scared. I don't know what all I'll be facing. It'll be unnerving, I'm sure--we'll be dealing with abject poverty. Sick people. Wounded. Hungry. Tired. Diseased. Hurting.

It's the hurting that will get to me.

For laundry, bathing, drinking

So many struggling just to eat day to day or to find clean drinking water. Of course, cholera is an issue there, so we'll see some of that, too.

The first day, we'll hike three hours up a mountain to reach a remote village that might not otherwise ever receive medical care. It's hard work, this mission, where we'll carry our supplies on our backs, be on our feet most of the day, staying in open air quarters. But whatever. That's nothing compared to what so many Haitians have to deal with on a daily basis.

And there's an orphanage on site, where I'm going. So we'll be surrounded by children, which, oh my word, how awesome, right? Their laughter. Their little hands. Even the teenagers with their heavy-lidded eyes and shy smiles...love it.

But these are not children like so many of our children. My children have me. No doubt. They know when they need me, I'm there. Any time, all the time. When they're hurting or angry or happy, I'm there. Always. But these kids?

They say sometimes the children will line up just to sit on your lap. That they'll follow you around talking and talking in creole, waiting for a smile from you or a laugh or a kind word they don't understand or for you to hold your arms out so they can jump into them.

This infant's life was saved last year

They know that when the foreigners come with their medical supplies, that they come not with candy or toys or any of the things that could be destructive giving, but with medicine to help them...and hands to hold. Every inch of my heart breaks at the thought of that kind of need. And yet I want to go, more than anything. I want to hold the hand of someone who needs it.

These Haitians? It calls to me, their need. So. I will go.

But I can't do it alone.

As part of this mission, all serving are required to get immunizations and raise enough to cover our plane tickets and stay in the meager accommodations as well as money for RX meds and supplies for the mission. Additionally, we're expected to bring as much over-the-counter medicine as we can carry. Right now, I'm short. Like, by a lot. I need to raise at least $400 more. And I have all of 13 boxes of OTC meds. I'm desperate enough that I've finally done what a couple of my friends have been telling me to do, and I'm turning to you for help.

So what I'm asking of you is to search deep inside yourself and do only what you can. Of course, your emotional support is just as valuable to me as anything else, but if you can spare even a dollar, less than the cost of a cup of coffee, that's a box of children's vitamins from the dollar store--at minimum. Because we also have pharmaceutical connections and can purchase RX drugs and supplies at cost, so that $20 can support the medical needs of something like 60 Haitians for over a month. Seriously. An American family can blow that in one meal eating out. If you feel that you can, please click on the Paypal Donate button to donate funds for this medical mission, as little or as much as you like.

But please. Only what you can. In exchange, we're trying to procure Internet in Haiti so that I can blog about what we're doing while we're there--and so you can see how your support is helping. But I'll ask you only to do what you feel is right, what you feel moved to do. Dude, just reading and tuning in, caring about the welfare of others, thinking about how connected we really are--that's huge, too.

Anyway, this has been a really hard post for me to write. How do I convey a need I feel inside myself in such a way you might feel it, too? I don't know, honestly. I don't. When you look at these eyes, do you feel it?

It's piercing, isn't it?

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Information about my trip in January

Locale: Medical clinic volunteers for Mission Haiti Medical will reside on the compound of L’Eglise De Dieu Reformee in Saintard, Haiti. Saintard is a small village in the Arcahaie region of Haiti, about 30 miles northwest of Port AuPrince, Haiti’s capital.

Accommodations: Accommodations are meager and volunteers are asked to share rooms with other volunteers. The sleeping quarters are open-air, but protected from rain by an overhead roof. Running water for the restroom and showers is used conservatively. Clean drinking water is provided at all times. Electricity and telephone services are unreliable and availability cannot be guaranteed.

Schedule: A Mission Haiti Medical work camp lasts 7-10 days. Three to five days are devoted to mobile clinics, in which the team travels to a rural area to provide a one-day clinic. These are full days and may involve driving through rough terrain and a few hours of mountain hiking. A mobile clinic requires medical professionals, but also relies on a team of persons to assist with procedures,
crowd control, and dispensing medications.
Language: The spoken language is Haitian Creole. Interpreters are used in the clinics.

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THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT. Seriously. Even just stopping by, reading, commenting. Huge.

***Please note, in order to prevent unscrupulous people from attempting a scam...while there might be others directing you to my site, I'm only accepting paypal donations from my blog/Facebook for my medical mission.

How to Prevent Your Own Google Account Hijacking

2011-11-13T23:54:00.000-05:00

On November 2, just as I was getting all set to return to the online world after an on-off (but mostly off) sabbatical, I discovered that someone had hacked into my email and spammed every one of my contacts, pretending to be me having been robbed at gunpoint, stranded in Spain and in desperate need of money and lessons in English grammar. But they didn't just "borrow" my email, these hackers. They hijacked my entire Google account. And by this, I mean these jackholes changed my password, of course. And then they removed my secondary (Yahoo) email, backup phone number and security question, all of which were security measures I put into place so that I could recover my account if I ever lost access to it. They also added their own email and backup phone number to my account. AND these jackholes also hacked my secondary email and then proceeded to spam everyone from my second account.And then they hacked my Facebook. Ouch.

Thankfully, they didn't change any of the password recovery info on the secondary Yahoo email, so we were able to recover this account right away--only to discover they'd deleted every single email and all of my contacts (presumably so I couldn't contact my friends to tell them about the scam). I did manage to recover my Facebook as well, but only because they didn't alter my security question. My primary email (gmail), however, was lost to me. As well as everything else linked to my Google account, including...this blog (and my Youtube, Google groups, Google+, all Google documents, and anything that required me to use my email info to log in). You can imagine what a damaging loss this is. Professionally, I was left exposed, turned into a quivering mass of vulnerability. Talk about demoralizing. I had no way to contact Google, no recourse for recovery except a stupid Google form I had to fill out to prove I was the owner of my Google account (which means having to remember the exact date I opened my Google account, who sent me my gmail invite, when I opened my blog and Google groups, etc.). I filled out this form three times before Google finally disabled my blog, pending an investigation.

Friday, I managed to recover my Google account finally. Clearly I'm not the hacker impersonating Carol--you can tell probably by my correct use of "demoralizing" and commas and the absence of begging for money (wait until tomorrow).

Okay, so, what's the deal, right? Why did they do this? Money, of course. After some research, I've discovered this is a really common scam/hackjob. And a very sophisticated one. Poor grammar aside, this email actually gave a number of my contacts pause, worried I was actually hurt and penniless in Spain . Intelligent people do fall for this because of their own big hearts (and end up providing their own info and money), which is why the jackholes keep doing it. Their programs/viruses work really fast in a really invasive way, and the scam emails are much better written and thought out now, urgent and designed to appeal to bleeding hearts.

Why did they attack me? Random probably. I did happen to have a $#!%load of contacts in both my emails, so mega score for the hackers. Chances are, though, I logged into a fake Google page which phished my password, and in a heartbeat, everything was gone.

What can you do to prevent your Google account from getting hacked? Or any email? So many of us have Google accounts which we use to access a load of programs. Get your Google (or Yahoo) account hijacked, and you're seriously SCREWED. But there are steps you can take to prevent this from happening.

1. Provide Password Recovery Info: That means a secondary email, backup phone number(s), and security questions and answers. Obviously, though, this isn't foolproof, as I did this. If they hack your password, they can change all of this. So...

2. In Google, you can also turn on 2-Step verification, which requires you to type in a verification code if you're accessing your Google account from anywhere other than your primary computer. This will require you to add a primary phone number and then a secondary backup phone number, to which the codes will be sent. Certain applications (such as iphone, Blackberry, or Android) will require a special application specific password if you're trying to log in with one of those. It's not convenient, of course. But it is safer. If I'd had this turned on, even with my password, hackers would've had to have my cell phone in their hands to access my account. NOTE: you can turn off and on 2-Step verification as you please; and Google does provide you with Backup codes that you can save in case you ever need to provide a verification code and don't have access to our phone(s).

3. DO NOT USE THE SAME PASSWORD for every account, application, and program. I know, I know, who wants to remember a million passwords? So much more convenient to have a single password for everything. But whatever program these hackers used was sophisticated enough to find every account associated with my gmail account and attempt to hack in with the same password. Thus, I also lost my secondary email, my Facebook, and my blog, and every account/program linked to them. Now, I have a list of passwords written down and in a text file I keep on my desktop and on a removable hard drive. Those passwords are also a billion miles long with symbols, numbers, and letters. I merely copy and paste when I need them.

4. EVERY time you prepare to log into an account, just take a quick glance at the URL of the sign-in page. Make sure it looks right and that you haven't just been redirected to a fake URL which mimics the real one. If it has an @ symbol in the URL, be wary. Double check the spelling of words in the address, too (www.gimail.com versus www.gmail.com). Best way to ensure you get a legitimate web address is to type in the URL yourself.

5. You can further protect your Yahoo accounts by creating a special Sign-in Seal for every computer you own. Go to your Yahoo "Account Info" and there you will find a link to create a Sign-in Seal (customized badge) that will appear in the top right corner every time you go to your Yahoo sign-in page. Then if you don't see that badge, you may have landed on a fake sign-in page that could phish your password.

5. Don't be lazy or vain or naive. Don't assume that you're not at risk. Phishing/hacking/hijacking doesn't only happens to stupid people who do dumb stuff like click on obvious spam links and search porn. Anyone can become a victim. Phishing schemes are becoming more and more sophisticated the wiser and more tech savvy we become as online users.

6. You can learn more about phishing schemes and how to prevent this sort of thing by checking out this page from Outlook. It's worth it to stop by, guys, and take a few precautions. It doesn't take long, and can save you serious misery.

What do you do if your account gets hacked/hijacked? Besides break things and curse Google to no end and write majorly gory hacker death scenes?

1. Attempt to do a Password Reset immediately before your password recovery information is deleted. If you're too late, you will need to:

2. Fill out an Account Recovery Form (this is what it's called in Google. Yahoo has something similar, I think). The questions on this are tough. Just answer to the best of your ability, providing as much accurate information as you can remember. If you don't get a response right away, fill out another form. You'll need to be patient as this may be a long wait, but be persistent. Hound their arses. And make it clear that you believe the account has been compromised so that they disable the account while it's being investigated to prevent hackers from using it.

When you recover your account,

1. First, change your passwords and do everything I said that you need to do to prevent this from happening again.

2. Double check to make sure any secondary email accounts and phone numbers that have been added by the hacker for their own password recovery purposes are removed from your account settings. If not, remove them.

3. Also, go into your mail settings (under "Forwarding and POP/IMAP") and double check to make sure that your messages are not getting forwarded to a secondary email that you did not yourself add (this was the case for me!), and then under "Accounts and Import" make sure no third party email still has access to your account.

4. Prepare to work your butt off to recover everything you lost while your account was hijacked, including all your emails and your contacts, which will likely have been deleted.

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Hope this doesn't happen to you. Sucks so hard, I can't even tell you.

Anyone else have any good tips on preventing any hacking/hijacking? Stories to share?

Exposed

2011-11-01T05:52:00.003-04:00

So.

I got sick this summer. And progressively sicker and sicker as fall came and wore on. Enough that I struggled to keep up my home and volunteer obligations. Enough that I couldn't always get out of bed. And a lot of days, I couldn't get much work done. Writing about something other than books was even tougher (hence, the glaring absence of such posts). I couldn't always think straight or even find the words for basic things ("Put the...thing in the...thing," I would say.) It took a lot of effort to read, let alone write a review. A post that used to take me an hour or two to write was taking me days--most of the time, I gave up. And then responding to comments became tougher because it took so much concentration, more than my fatigued body and mind could handle.

You can imagine what it felt like to stare at my own book, my own words, unable to make much sense of it all. Along came depression, yeah? That's what happens to a writer that can't write. I can tell you it sucks feeling broken.

But, I'm doing better now. Awesome, huh? While I still struggle to pull the late nights I was accustomed to, I'm a much happier person, feeling good. I was even able to go to the World Fantasy Convention last week (picture post to come soon). It didn't take much, really. Now that we know what was wrong.

Still, I feel sad that I've let so much time pass between you and me. I feel like I've neglected our friendship...like with those of you waiting for giveaway results or for books or correspondence from me; I'm especially sorry about that [on that note, I've finally posted the winner of the signed AUDITION and the winners of the signed JAY ASHER books]. I can't promise that I'll be able to post regularly, but I can promise that I'll give it my best shot. I hope you still want to be friends.

Anyway, I wasn't going to say anything. I'm not all that comfortable sharing this kind of stuff. Any kind of personal stuff, actually. I've always felt very protective of my private life (It's not because I have photos on my phone à la Scarlett Johansson. Probably.) You might have noticed, too, I rarely talk about my writing, which ranks right up there with my family and home life as PRIVATE-PERSONAL-CONFIDENTIAL-DO-NOT-TOUCH. Having any sort of online presence makes me feel...hm. Vulnerable? No, that's not the right word. Naked? Protective? I can't explain it, maybe.

Since I started this blog, I've taken regular, long breaks from it, usually when I'm feeling a little overexposed. Is it a writer thing, you think? Or...probably just a weird personality quirk, huh? I see some writer/bloggers who don't seem to have a problem talking about their Real Life lives, especially their writing. It's admirable, really. But my writing is like, I don't know--like my soul? Is that too melodramatic? I'm not sure if my resistance to sharing it or anything about it is born out of insecurity or self confidence or supremely anal perfectionism or clever marketing. Maybe all the above. But I do know this isn't likely to change, at least not until there's a book to promote, in which case you might be like, WTF, Carol? Or maybe even, You write? Or, I thought you weren't a real person.

P.S. I'll try not to get sucky sick again. But chances are, if it happens again, you'll probably not know about it unless I feel guilty for neglecting you. Sorry...

Audition, Sacrifice, and a Signed Giveaway

2011-10-13T02:38:00.027-04:00

Not long ago, I talked about this book:

AUDITION
by Stasia Kehoe

You remember what it's about? In case you don't, here's what Goodreads says:

When high school junior Sara wins a coveted scholarship to study ballet, she must sacrifice everything for her new life as a professional dancer-in-training. Living in a strange city with a host family, she's deeply lonely-until she falls into the arms of Remington, a choreographer in his early twenties. At first, she loves being Rem's muse, but as she discovers a surprising passion for writing, she begins to question whether she's chosen the right path. Is Rem using her, or is it the other way around? And is dancing still her dream, or does she need something more? This debut novel in verse is as intense and romantic as it is eloquent.

Here's what I said about AUDITION in a roundabout way before I even read it in this post called IF IT DOESN'T ALMOST KILL YOU, IT'S JUST COKE ZERO. And in case you don't want to actually read the post, the gist of it was this: If you're not sacrificing for it, it's not a dream as much as it's just something you like a lot. Okay, seriously, just go read it because that's not all I said. Anyway, the point is that it was the premise of AUDITION that got me thinking about dreams and what it takes to achieve them.

And now that I've read AUDITION (a few months ago, actually), I can tell you that I still feel the same way. Stronger, actually. See, the thing is we have this tendency to blame other people when our dreams don't come true. And maybe, sometimes, it is the case that your dream falling to pieces is not your fault at all. Say your dream is to go to Mars wearing only tinfoil. You can't help it that this doesn't happen. But a lot of dreams (most, even?) are up to you to make it happen. Up to you to sacrifice, I mean. Take...publishing, for example. We all know publishing is cutthroat and it can bleed you of your sanity. For some people, the obstacles become a bit Job-like, and it seems the trials are greater than any mere mortal should be asked to withstand.

But, really, the dream's not over until you either die or give up. If you die first, well, dang. Sorry. If you give up...maybe the sacrifice is just too great. Maybe, just maybe you don't want it bad enough. Something to think about.

It's what AUDITION gets you thinking about.

So while we're on the topic, I should tell you that AUDITION gets you thinking about a lot, actually. Dance, for one thing. And I love dancing, of any kind (except for clogging--that just kind of wigs me out). But as much as this book deals with dance, it's not actually about dance. It's about, I don't know...sacrifice...pain...heartache--all of these things. But all of these things come about because of one thing: longing. A longing for acceptance, achievement, love, affection, attention, success, glory, hope. It pushes the cry of teenage existence to the forefront: See me! In other words, Do not overlook me, forget me, neglect me, or see me as something other than what I am.

Because that's all a teenager (anyone) really wants, isn't it? To be seen and heard and felt. The problem, of course, seems to be that teens don't always know how to go about being seen. Sometimes, this results in a dream that is formed out of a spark of recognition/success. Remember when your art teacher said, "What a lovely drawing, Johnny!" and you suddenly had aspirations to become an artist? Or when you made money babysitting and wondered if you should be a nanny for the rest of forever? It's easy to form a dream out of something that let us be seen for just a moment. So what happens when you start to realize that the sacrifice to achieve that dream may cost you more than it's worth? This is what AUDITION explores in heart-wrenching detail.

AUDITION is beautiful. So, so poignant and sad and happy and alive. It is poetry, yes, but poetry that reads like narrative. Within a few stanzas, you forget you're reading verse, and then the story simply comes to life, like listening to the lyrics of a song. You will find yourself reading the words out loud just to listen to the sound of it, and sometimes you will whip through because you must know, you must, what will happen to Sara. And you will grip your book tight, and wonder, why, why, why, Sara?? But you might then discover that there are boundaries you too might cross, just like Sara, if you were in the same toe shoes.

This was my first experience with a novel in verse, and I can't think of a more breathtaking initiation. AUDITION is tense and edgy and yet it doesn't grip you by the throat--it captivates you with its grace.

Now go get it, so we can talk about it. The best parts of this book are the parts I can't discuss here without spoiling it for everyone.

Also, be sure to check out Lisa and Laura Roecker's thoughts on AUDITION. You might be surprised what they have to say about AUDITION and dreams.

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Want a Signed Hardcover of AUDITION?

Click here to enter to win a Signed Hardcover of AUDITION

This giveaway is international and ends Monday, October 24, midnight EST. You must be 13 years old to enter. If you win, you will need to provide an address for shipment. Under 18's must have parent/guardian permission to enter.

This giveaway is now closed. And the winner of a signed Hardcover of AUDITION is:

Veronica

Please email an address to which I can send you your book! Thanks so much to all who entered! Please stay tuned for the next giveaway.

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Also, major congratulations to Shannon Whitney Messenger on the sale of her middle grade KEEPER OF THE LOST CITIES! Woo-hoo! Be sure to wish Shannon congrats!! *Dances*

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See what the other Bookanistas are highlighting today:

Elana Johnson offers a preview of upcoming awesome!
LiLa Roecker dances for Audition
Christine Fonseca is wowed by Witch Eyes
Beth Revis features a guest post by Darkfall author Janice Hardy
Carolina Valdez Miller steps up to Audition – with giveaway
Shana Silver contemplates The Future of Us
Carrie Harris is dazzled by Don’t Stop Now
Corrine Jackson celebrates the success of Epic Fail
Shelli Johannes-Wells is psyched for some swell book launches!

A Review of THE FUTURE OF US and a Signed Jay Asher Giveaway

2011-10-06T02:34:00.017-04:00

I hate to break it to you, but I'm not giving away a signed Jay Asher. I am, however, giving away a couple of his signed books, including an ARC of THE FUTURE OF US, cowritten with Carolyn Mackler (and signed by both) and a signed award winning THIRTEEN REASONS WHY.

Below, you'll also find my review of THE FUTURE OF US. You may notice I say nothing about the awesomeness of the authors. I wanted to focus on the book, because that's what reviews do. But let it be known, they are awesome, in that same way that cereal covered donuts are awesome.

Onward.

THE FUTURE OF US
by Jay Asher and Carolyn Mackler

Summary: It's 1996, and less than half of all American high school students have ever used the Internet.
Emma just got her first computer and an America Online CD-ROM.
Josh is her best friend. They power up and log on--and discover themselves on Facebook, fifteen years in the future.
Everybody wonders what their Destiny will be. Josh and Emma are about to find out.

MY REVIEW
Teenagers from 1996 stumbling across some time warp glitch in a computer to discover their Facebook identities fifteen years later? SOLD. In fact, I liked the premise so much I was a little dubious. So often I get excited about a book only to read it and find myself curling into a fetal position, ripping my hair out in clumps. But, just so you know, one day. That's it. That's what it took me to read this book. I set aside my entire life just to read this. Happily.

Okay, so I love 1996. For obvious reasons. So I won't mention them here. But I will say those reasons make it into the book. You'll see. If you were a teenager in 1996 and on Facebook today, reading THE FUTURE OF US makes you feel like you're a part of a secret club where you know the secret handshake and all the inside jokes. BUT. The cool thing is you don't have to have been a teenager in 1996 to get it. And to love it. You don't have to have been alive, even. If you're a teenager today, you'll read it and probably scoff at the idiocy of us poor schmucks who carted around gigantic Discmans to go jogging, in the same way we old people laugh at those even older people who wore plaid bell bottoms like on purpose. So, there's that aspect of it--laughing at prehistoric times, which always makes for good reading.

But also, and more importantly, there's a story here. A solid, beautiful story. Friendship, love, hopes, dreams, fears--everything all teenagers face whether it's 1996 or 2011. Indeed, everything we face at any age. But as teens, we don't always know that. It's impossible to imagine a life of experience when our experiences have been so limited. So, yeah, we all want to see our futures because there's just no picture our minds can realistically conjure of them yet, not as teens (or maybe ever). But man, how dangerous if it actually happens, right? Have we learned nothing from BACK TO THE FUTURE? Well, yeah, that getting a view of your grown-up self makes for glorious fiction. I still get a huge kick out of stories like THIRTEEN GOING ON THIRTY, BIG and now THE FUTURE OF US. It's an exploration of possibility and consequence. As teenagers, many of us said we had no idea what we wanted out of our lives, but really, come on, we knew. We knew. And we sort of thought we'd get it right? A happy ending. Pshaw! Here's what you learn in THE FUTURE OF US: there's no such thing as a happy ending. Or a sad ending. Err...or an ending. There's just a happy or a sad now, your choice.

What I love most, and what makes this such an original story is that these characters don't actually travel to the future. They merely get to see it, AND see how the things they do (and change) in the present affect those fragile futures of theirs. It's a bit of an eye-opener. Just imagine seeing your future change with every choice you make, small or big--how powerful you might feel, and equally helpless, because not all actions are within our control. THE FUTURE OF US is more than just a cool comedy/fantasy/romance about two teenagers who get to see their futures on Facebook. It's a poignant exploration of identity and longing and a touching look into the lives of two teenagers who circumnavigate extraordinary circumstances to find each other in their ordinary lives.

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Today, I'm offering

ARC of THE FUTURE OF US, Signed by both Jay Asher and Carolyn Mackler

AND

THIRTEEN REASONS WHY Signed by Jay Asher

This giveaway is international and ends Monday, October 24, midnight EST. You must be 13 years old to enter. If you win, you will need to provide an address for shipment. Under 18's must have parent/guardian permission to enter.

Click Here to Enter the Signed Jay Asher Giveaway

This Giveaway has now closed. Here are the winners:

Signed ARC of THE FUTURE OF US

Katy U.

Signed THIRTEEN REASONS WHY

Mary B.

Congratulations winners! Please email me an address to which I can send your book. Thanks so much to all that entered. Stay tuned for the next giveaway!

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Winners of my last giveaway (ASHFALL, WITHOUT TESS, UNFORSAKEN, TRIS & IZZIE) are posted HERE.

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Be sure to check out what the other Bookanistas are highlighting today!

Elana Johnson is obsessed with Possess
Christine Fonseca twirls for Audition
Shannon Whitney Messenger is wowed by The White Assassin – with giveaway
Shelli Johannes-Wells applauds The Pledge
Beth Revis interviews The Girl of Fire & Thorns author Rae Carson
Carolina Valdez Miller delves into The Future of Us – with signed book giveaway
Shana Silver shouts out about Shut Out
Sarah Frances Hardy fancies You Will Be My Friend

Review of ASHFALL and 4 ARC Giveaway

2011-09-29T02:33:00.007-04:00

I know, I'm starting to wonder if I'll ever do anything besides reviews and giveaways, too. Not that it's bad, yeah? But thou shalt not be a one trick pony...eventually. Truth is, I'm barely even managing reviews at the moment. My family and all their needs are a full time job. Like for real. But in addition to that and to some volunteer obligations, I'm also working on preparation for a medical mission trip I'm taking to Haiti in January, organizing paperwork and meetings and emails and the like, but also starting up a fundraising campaign as well as trying to convince people to donate medication to take with me. It's all good work, worth every minute, but it saps me of energy and my time. What little I've got left I've had to devote to my writing. Or mindless television. Eh, you know how it is. (Remind me to write that post on Terra Nova. Seriously. Gawd.)

So, I'm glad to see you stop by when you do. I've got several non-review blog posts written (in my head). I'll try to get them posted soon. I promise I'll make them as controversial as possible. Or maybe just add naked people. Or something.

Be sure to check out the giveaway below the review and the other Bookanista reviews.

P.S. As always, thank you.

ASHFALL by Mike Mullin

Summary: Under the bubbling hot springs and geysers of Yellowstone National Park is a supervolcano. Most people don't know it's there. The caldera is so large that it can only be seen from a plane or satellite. It just could be overdue for an eruption, which would change the landscape and climate of our planet.

Ashfall is the story of Alex, a teenage boy left alone for the weekend while his parents visit relatives. When the Yellowstone supervolcano erupts unexpectedly, Alex is determined to reach his parents. He must travel over a hundred miles in a landscape transformed by a foot of ash and the destruction of every modern convenience that he has ever known, and through a new world in which disaster has brought out both the best and worst in people desperate for food, water, and warmth. With a combination of nonstop action, a little romance, and very real science, this is a story that is difficult to stop reading and even more difficult to forget.

MY REVIEW
I've read a lot of post-apocalyptic-y stories lately, so I went into ASHFALL wondering how it might be different from all the rest. And here's what I concluded: Holy crap. ASHFALL is somehow one part terrifying and one part hope. And really, it's that hope that sets it apart. For starters.

Okay, so for the terrifying--as far as world-altering catastrophes go, this story is totally possible. We're not talking an outbreak of a disease that will eventually run its course after killing off a large sector of the population (or a disease that turns people in crazed, cannibalistic zombies), or cyborgs that take over the world, or some mind-altering drug that heightens the intelligence of apes and turns them against humans. While all these make for super cool stories, there's always the knowledge that these scenarios aren't that possible (or if they are, they're likely not permanent). But a supervolcano eruption? In our lifetime? Totally feasible and totally world changing. It's this knowledge that underscores every page.

There's also the genuine way in which the story is told. Thought it's not present in an in-your-face sort of way, I can imagine serious research went into the writing of ASHFALL. Science and psychology play a large role, from the way in which the eruption affects the landscape to the ingenious McGyver-y methods employed by characters for overcoming hurdles, as well as the human reactions to catastrophe. Alex, the mc, faces some really dark times in this, as you might imagine when food and supplies are scarce. This story is a fresh, realistic depiction of what happens when governments collapse and survival is threatened. Alex faces danger far beyond starvation, and is forced to mature very quickly.

But there's hope, too, and this is what I found particularly refreshing about this story. While some truly horrendous things do happen, we also see some of the best sides of human nature. See, catastrophe doesn't bring out ONLY the worst in people. I'm so happy to see a book illustrate how amazing humans can be in the face of tragedy and despair. And in the midst of it all, there's love, too. A bit of romance, but from a male POV, which is awesome. And he's not some hunky stud of a male either, but a geeky 15-16 year old in the height of adolescent splendor (*cough*). This too is treated genuinely, so, yah, there's some awkwardness and blushing. Great fun, I tell you. ASHFALL is at times quite grim, packed with heart pounding action, but there's humor too and moments of respite. It's a book you won't be able to put down.

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Up for grabs today (click on book covers for summary in a new window:

Signed ARC of ASHFALL
by Mike Mullin

ARC of WITHOUT TESS
by Marcella Pixley

ARC OF UNFORSAKEN
by Sophie Littlefield

Signed ARC of TRIS AND IZZIE
by Mette Ivie Harrison

This giveaway is international and ends Monday, October 3, midnight EST. You must be 13 years old to enter. If you win, you will need to provide an address for shipment. Under 18's must have parent/guardian permission to enter.

Click Here to enter the 4 ARC International Giveaway

Thanks for entering!

THIS GIVEAWAY HAS NOW CLOSED

Here are the winners:

Signed ARC of ASHFALL
Mary D.

ARC of WITHOUT TESS
Julie W.

ARC of UNFORSAKEN
Kristin L.

ARC of TRIS & IZZIE
Roselyn C.

Congratulations on your win! Please email me an address to which I can ship your book. Huge thank you to all who entered! If you haven't done so yet, be sure to enter to win Signed Jay Asher books (an ARC of THE FUTURE OF US and THIRTEEN REASONS WHY).

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Be sure to check out what the other Bookanistas are highlighting:

Elana Johnson interviews Elle Strauss, author of Clockwise
LiLa Roecker discusses S R Johannes' e-book experiment
Christine Fonseca is wowed by The White Assassin - with giveaway
Shannon Whitney Messenger loves Lola & the Boy Next Door – with giveaway
Beth Revis delights in The Unbecoming of Mara Dyer – with giveaway
Shelli Johannes-Wells falls for Fracture
Carolina Valdez Miller adores Ashfall – with giveaway
Jessi Kirby marvels at The Unbecoming of Mara Dyer
Shana Silver steps up to Audition
Corrine Jackson is crazy about Cracked
Stasia Ward Kehoe swoons for Swan and To Dance

Review of THE NAME OF THE STAR and Winners

2011-09-20T08:35:00.000-04:00

THE NAME OF THE STAR
by Maureen Johnson

(Click on the book cover for summary in a new window)

My Review:

In THE NAME OF THE STAR, I probably chose the least representative of all of Maureen Johnson’s books to read first. From what I hear, she’s generally an all-the-way contemporary fiction writer, except THE NAME OF THE STAR is not exactly all the way contemp. Still, after reading this book, I’m so in love with Maureen Johnson’s voice that I’m pretty sure I’ll read everything she’s ever written and everything she’ll ever write, if only to try to find another book as hookish as that one. And by hookish, I do not mean prostitutish. Obviously.

So you know, although it’s the very first thing that snags my undying loyalty, it’s not just the voice in TNOTS that hooks me. There’s also the sheer cleverness of the story, seamlessly blending a historical event with supernatural fiction—not to mention the beautiful wit of its narrator. All the pieces just sort of fall into place, you know? There’s never any stretching or twisting or not-so-subtle patching to make the story work. It’s just, I don’t know, fluid I guess, merging past with present—and creepy. Because there’s that. It’s not a story to read to the little ones, even if you had a mind to read to them a modern-day Jack the Ripper story. I read right before bed and ended up sleeping with my closet light on. It would be impossible to tell you why without giving the plot away, but trust me—there’s an element of creepy-scary-awesome in this that glues you to the book. It raises a what-if that is terrifying to contemplate. You can’t help but think about what it would be like if that really were possible. Really, it’s only the best books that drive you to this level of thought and then keep you thinking it. All. night. long. Pretty cool, actually.

Aside from the fear factor, (which honestly, is not prohibitively prominent), there are two other major elements which really carry the story. Okay, yes, the voice (there’s always that, but it hardly counts as a mere element—that’s more like the whole periodic table), but:

1. The humor—carries much of the story. The thing is there are parts that are creepy. And sad. And surprising. But there’s almost always some humor. A feel of lightness, really, which should not be mistaken for a voice that takes the story too lightly. It’s merely a different approach that keeps the story from being overwhelmingly dark. It feels more accessible to a larger audience.

2. Authenticity—Johnson just nails teen behavior, from voice to actions to snogging, well enough that if I hadn’t met her, I’d wonder if she weren’t a teenager with a super wise brain. There’s a clear level of maturity in this, evident in the character arc (namely, Rory's progression of thought), but the choices, actions, and thoughts of the characters remain perfectly, gloriously teen from beginning to end.

3. Setting—I forgot to say three. There are three major elements in addition to the fear factor which really raise the bar for all YA. The story of TNOTS takes place entirely in London, with mentions of Louisiana as that’s where Rory is from. While I can’t speak for the authenticity of the Louisiana backstory (although it felt vivid), as I’ve only been to New Orleans for a very short time, the London setting feels alive and genuine, at least as far as an American encountering it firsthand might experience it (I lived in England for a couple of years, and it definitely sparked a number of memories for me). Indeed, the setting itself begins to feel like a separate character with its own personality full of quirks and misbehaviors. Thankfully, Johnson doesn’t load the dialogue with phonetically spelled dialect or bog it down with difficult to understand speech/slang for Americans/non-British, even with characters that have thick London dialects, but the richness of the language and the city comes through regardless. TNOTS is a transportive experience, taking you out of your comfy spot on your recliner and dropping you into the middle of a boarding sixth form in London.

I haven’t mentioned the creativity in this story, although perhaps that goes without saying. But truly, I was really surprised by TNOTS. It’s pretty unpredictable, but not in that unpredictable-because-there-aren’t-any-hints-all-along kind of way. It’s just well done, a proper mystery with a splash of supernatural thriller. And romance—oh the lovely romance (remember the snogging I mentioned? Plenty of that, which goes back to that authentic teen element I mentioned). And of course, drama and cozy friendship and adolescent shenanigans that make adults so jealous because it’s lame to do those things once you grow back hair. THE NAME OF THE STAR is a perfect combination of clever, quirky-dry funny and dark--and in every way memorable.

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My giveaways for GLOW and Maureen Johnson books have now closed. Here are the winners:

ARC of GLOW by Amy Kathleen Ryan

Lisa H.

Signed ARC of THE NAME OF THE STAR

Liza (the one who entered without a last name)

Signed DEVILISH

Stephanie A.

Signed THE BERMUDEZ TRIANGLE

Sharon M.

Congratulations, winners! Please email me an address to which I can send your book. Thank you so much to all who entered and for supporting my blog! Please stay tuned for the next giveaway, coming soon!

Giveaway of Signed Maureen Johnson Books (including ARC)

2011-09-16T02:37:00.008-04:00

Yeah. Another giveaway. I've actually been hanging on to these for a while. I got new bookcases recently and shelved all the books I'd been keeping in dumb piles on the floor and on my dining room table and on my nightstand and on my mini fridge and in boxes and on a wicker chair and also in my daughter's bedroom. So anyway, once I shelved them I promptly forgot about them. So, today I went browsing through the shelves and started reading Maureen Johnson's newest book THE NAME OF THE STAR. I should probably mention this is my first Maureen book and also that several pages in I kissed the cover and said, "Where have you been all my life, Maureen?" The story so far (about half way in) is pretty awesome, but mostly it's the voice that's grabbed me. I don't think I've been this in love with just a voice since John Green. And there's the setting, too, which takes me back to London, one of my favorite places on Earth, and in the form of an American who's come to live (reminding me so vividly of my first hilarious days of my life abroad).

Yeah. I will likely finish this book tonight (It's currently almost 10 PM). Review to come soon.

So.

Anyway.

I'd like to share my discovery of Maureen with others in the form of ARCage and Signed bookage. Here's what's up for grabs today:

(Click on the book covers to see a summary in another window)

Signed ARC of THE NAME OF THE STAR

Signed copy of DEVILISH

Signed copy of THE BERMUDEZ TRIANGLE

CLICK HERE to Enter to Win Signed Maureen Johnson Books

This giveaway is international and ends Sunday, September 18, midnight EST. You must be 13 years old to enter. If you win, you will need to provide an address for shipment. Under 18's must have parent/guardian permission to enter.

Also, don't forget to enter to win an ARC of GLOW by Kathleen Ryan. Also ends Sunday.

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THIS SPACE IS RESERVED FOR A REVIEW OF MAUREEN JOHNSON'S THE NAME OF THE STAR.

Review of GLOW and SHIFTING (with ARC Giveaway)

2011-09-15T02:30:00.009-04:00

I'm seriously backed up on reviews. I've read loads and really need to somehow catch up while continuing to read. Mega conundrum. So, I'll just dive in. Two reviews for you today.

OH! And a new giveaway. Check it out below the review of GLOW. It's got a soonish end date.

GLOW by Amy Kathleen Ryan

Goodreads Summary: What if you were bound for a new world, about to pledge your life to someone you'd been promised to since birth, and one unexpected violent attack made survival—not love—the issue?
Out in the murky nebula lurks an unseen enemy: the New Horizon. On its way to populate a distant planet in the wake of Earth's collapse, the ship's crew has been unable to conceive a generation to continue its mission. They need young girls desperately, or their zealous leader's efforts will fail. Onboard their sister ship, the Empyrean, the unsuspecting families don't know an attack is being mounted that could claim the most important among them...
Fifteen-year-old Waverly is part of the first generation to be successfully conceived in deep space; she was born on the Empyrean, and the large farming vessel is all she knows. Her concerns are those of any teenager—until Kieran Alden proposes to her. The handsome captain-to-be has everything Waverly could ever want in a husband, and with the pressure to start having children, everyone is sure he's the best choice. Except for Waverly, who wants more from life than marriage—and is secretly intrigued by the shy, darkly brilliant Seth.
But when the Empyrean faces sudden attack by their assumed allies, they quickly find out that the enemies aren't all from the outside

MY REVIEW
I know what you're thinking. Space travel to create a new world? Um, doesn't this sound like ACROSS THE UNIVERSE? I don't know, maybe you're not thinking that, but let's say you are. Okay, yes, it does share a common concept, but it's not exactly a new concept. It's all about the execution, i.e. the clever unfolding of the story. Right?

The good news is GLOW has a pretty kicking storyline. It holds its own, and beyond the first page, similarities really fade away. I was hooked from the beginning, and I have to tell you, did not see the twists in this coming. Taking its cues from pretty much most of YA lately, GLOW is a bit of a genre buster. It's got a space opera feel as well as a strong dystopian element with a hint of Lord of the Flies slash Matched--BUT, it's faster paced than either one of those with a love triangle that...isn't. It's a sort of coming of age story dropped into the middle of a survival book--where survival is a constant quest...in space.

The story is actually told from two points of view, but it's not constantly alternating. You see a block of time occur in one POV, and then a block of time occur in another. But the important thing is it works. The sections weren't jarring, each section just the right length to make you anxious to see the other POV. And I never stopped to think, "I wish this were in the other person's POV." Really well thought out.

Most of all, I was impressed by how much GLOW made me stop and think. It indirectly presents ideas, and then, as if listening to a debate, you get to see contrary ideas that seemed just as valid. Boils down to where you're standing and what you stand to gain or lose. Talk about verisimilitude in science fiction.

But when I say science fiction, I don't mean it in the hard sense. GLOW is really accessible. A lot of cool, realistic futuristic concepts, but there's a strong emphasis on characterization. Love, hate, hopes, dreams, loss, humanity, inhumanity, greed, loneliness, desperation, and above all, an unquenchable need to continue existing. This is what any good YA-space-opera-dystopian-survivalist love story is all about. I, for one, am digging the genre busting, but I'm especially taken with GLOW.

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CLICK HERE to win an ARC of GLOW

This giveaway is international and ends Sunday, September 18, midnight EST. You must be 13 years old to enter. If you win, you will need to provide an address for shipment. Under 18's must have parent/guardian permission to enter.

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And now, review number 2. You'll possibly be seeing me double up on reviews for a while, if I can manage it. I have so many books I want to talk about. And a bunch to give away.

SHIFTING by Bethany Wiggins

Goodreads summary: After bouncing from foster home to foster home, Magdalene Mae is transferred to what should be her last foster home in the tiny town of Silver City, New Mexico. Now that she's eighteen and has only a year left in high school, she's determined to stay out of trouble and just be normal. Agreeing to go to the prom with Bridger O'Connell is a good first step. Fitting in has never been her strong suit, but it's not for the reasons most people would expect-it all has to do with the deep secret that she is a shape shifter. But even in her new home danger lurks, waiting in the shadows to pounce. They are the Skinwalkers of Navajo legend, who have traded their souls to become the animal whose skin they wear-and Maggie is their next target.
Full of romance, mysticism, and intrigue, this dark take on Navajo legend will haunt readers to the final page.

MY REVIEW

Just as a side note, this is actually the third cover I've seen for this book. The first was a girl facing a cheetah head on. The second was a shot of a girl from the back with the braid morphing into a snake. And then this one. And I must say, I like this one best. It suits Maggie's personality well. Her eyes really say it all, revealing the depth of sorrow within her as well as her fierce determination.

Which brings me to my first point. One of the greatest qualities of SHIFTING is that it isn't afraid to go there. In SHIFTING, we see a foster child who has faced abuse and real hardship. And through it all, her reactions to her life feel real. She's not artificially wise, capable of adult-level introspection . When she buys a pretty outfit--from Wal-Mart--she feels glamorous because it's new. And she's not ashamed of wearing charity clothes. You know what they say--it's not until Eve was made to feel ashamed that she was aware of her nudity. And her foster mother, as kind as she is, isn't made of money either. SHIFTING bypasses the old cliché of the poor kid getting taken in by the rich family and given a new lease on life. At times I cringed, wanting so much to give this girl a hug. She's really suffered, and yet, she's really strong regardless.

And that's not even getting into the paranormal aspect of the story. If you read the summary, or...eh hmm...the title, you know Maggie's a shapeshifter. But not just any shapeshifter. SHIFTING has a clever new spin on the whole concept, incorporating the Navajo legend of the skinwalkers--also given a clever twist. What's more, Maggie's reactions to the shapeshifting ability feel truly genuine. It made for some pretty humorous scenes. There were some sad ones, too, as well as a bit of youthful drama that you would expect in YA, all of it adding richness to the story and making Maggie feel like more of a 3D character.

Did I mention the romance? Because there's that, too. But that doesn't come any more easily to Maggie than the shapeshifting. Bridger's got his own secrets, which adds to the tension, and as the summary says, the intrigue. There's a great mystery and a certain level of darkness that stems from her difficult past, her troubled present and unknown future in love and shapeshifting. You can't help but feel pulled in. SHIFTING is a fairly quick, enjoyable read with surprising twists and a clever new spin on old ideas.

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If you missed the giveaway for the ARC of GLOW...

CLICK HERE to win an ARC of GLOW

This giveaway is international and ends Sunday, September 18, midnight EST. You must be 13 years old to enter. If you win, you will need to provide an address for shipment. Under 18's must have parent/guardian permission to enter.

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Also, be sure to check out what the other Bookanistas are highlighting today!

Elana Johnson is in a tizzy over Texas Gothic

LiLa Roecker celebrates Something Like Hope

Christine Fonseca is transformed by Shifting

Shannon Whitney Messenger takes a shine to So Silver Bright – with giveaway

Scott Tracey is on board for Starship Academy

Beth Revis shouts out The Name of the Star

Shana Silver loves Lola and the Boy Next Door

Rosemary Clement Moore is distracted by Alien Invasion & Other Inconveniences

Sarah Frances Hardy adores Birdie’s Big Girl Dress

Stasia Ward Kehoe takes a fancy to Fracture

Revisiting: Making Your Super Characters Extraordinary

2011-09-14T02:31:00.001-04:00

Dude. I feel horrible that I haven't posted in so long. Like every day nearly I've said, "Tomorrow I will post." But I'm still stretched pretty thin. (Although, blogging is the goal first thing tomorrow, like as soon as I get home, which might not happen until about 9 PM since Wednesday are pretty much chock-full-o-nuts days for me, but IT WILL HAPPEN--I'm freaking stubborn.) And at the moment, I seriously have to get to sleep. I have to be up in just a few hours, but this is weighing on me, the not posting. So, for today, I'm going to do something I've never done before. I'm reposting one of my more popular posts from a long time ago. Hope that's okay.

Making Your Super Characters Extraordinary

At dinner, over a discussion of Superman, my cousin’s wife brought up the notion of changing her hair color to hide her superhero identity (actually, first she said that Brandon Routh did not honor the suit—I think because he was too skinny; it’s a valid argument, but not the one I’m making here). Then I got to thinking what my superhero self would look like. I think I might do something with my hair. Maybe wear something shiny like any self-respecting superhero. And glasses. Can’t forget the glasses. Because glasses help to hide who you really are. And since I wear contact lenses most of the time, my superhero self would have to have glasses.

So here I am, in my everyday disguise. Boring ol’ Carol.

And here I am in full superhero splendor. Meet me, AKA Cool Girl.

No, seriously. That’s me!! It’s crazy how little it takes to make yourself into someone else entirely. Look at Miley Cyrus. I bet it blew your mind when you found out she was really Hannah Montana with a wig on. And Lady Gaga? NEWS ALERT: She’s not always a superhero. Sometimes, she wears non-shiny clothes.
Unfortunately, you can’t slap a cape on an ordinary fictional character and make them extraordinary. If you’re struggling to make your characters more appealing (especially in UF/SFF/Paranormal), it may be because you’re only making your character extraordinary on the surface. You have to dig deeper than that. Can’t just give your characters a cool ability/job/location and expect that to do the trick.

Let’s face it, it wasn’t the shiny boots and tights that made Superman so fabulous. It wasn’t even because he was so super. Not really. It's just his real life personality was so impossibly different from Superman’s personality. He lived out the fantasy that so many of us have—to be able to put on a cape and become way cooler than we are (I may look like a nerd, but you should see me in tights).

So what can you do to make your characters extraordinary?

1. First and foremost, your characters must have DEPTH. This means that your characters MUST HAVE:

A. Motivations. You don't act without motivation. (You might think you do, but you don't. All acts stem from some motivation, whether conscious or unconconscious, so it should be the same for your characters.) So even if your characters don't know why they act the way they do, YOU SHOULD.

B. Human qualities we all have. Things like dreams, hatreds, desires, goals, weaknesses, strengths, longings, secrets, embarrassments...without these qualities, we become robotic and boring. So do your characters.

C. Emotions. Layers of them. And their emotions should correspond with their personalities. Some people might cry at funerals, others laugh uncontrollably. Bring in the prostitute mourner in the red dress, and watch the tears dry up, and the sense of awe/embarrassment/shock/discomfort/anger/confusion take over.

D. Internal Conflict. If Peter Parker hadn't worried as much about what might have happened to Mary Jane Watson (movies, not comic books), he probably wouldn't have turned her away and limited himself only to spidey kisses hanging upside down. He was SO torn, wanting revenge for his murdered uncle, feeling guilty it might've been his fault, his love for Mary Jane which has to go unfulfilled, and the many issues he has with the supervillains (the issues with the Green Goblin and his son alone could drive a therapist mad).

2. Second, you must latch on to the unexpected…

A. …in the characters' personalities and subsequent actions. Nobody ever expected vampires ~~to sparkle~~ to fall in love with humans—or to go to high school. Nobody expected Forrest Gump to go to college or to win International ping pong tournaments or to inspire a nation. And nobody expected Superman would be some shy, nerdy journalist. Audiences can’t wait to see what unexpected things such unexpected characters will get up to.

B. …in the characters’ motivations. In Will Grayson, Will Grayson, nobody expected that Tiny Cooper, best-friend-of-Will Grayson/gay-football-player’s greatest motivation in life would be to find love and let his light shine through the most fabulous high school musical the world has ever seen.

C. ...in the characters' human qualities. A secret doesn't have to be big to feel HUGE. Not if it's unexpected. Say a boy carries around a rock in his pocket with a face drawn on it, yarn for hair. It's name is Albert. Occasionally, he pets it when he gets nervous. At home, he sets it on his nightstand and talks to it. But it's his secret. He'll never tell anyone about it. No one would make fun of him, especially because his mom just died, but to him, it'd be humiliating. He's fifteen.

D. ...in the characters' emotions. Have you seen HANCOCK? The depressed superhero? Yeah. Unexpected.

E ...in the characters' internal conflict. Let's take this one back to TWILIGHT, shall we? Because what could be more unexpected than a vampire fretting over having sex with his human girlfriend because he might get too excited and drink her blood and kill her? Seriously. UNEXPECTED. Kudos, Meyer.

Caveat: Make the unexpected believable. Or make it so freaking awesome that your audience will gladly abandon reason and force themselves to buy it.

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These are just some ways to make your characters worthy of kickass plots. I bet you have some tricks, too.

Humbled

2011-09-02T09:55:00.001-04:00

Just wanted to pop in and mention a couple things.

First, I WANTED TO THANK YOU!!!

for stopping by whenever you make it. I know I haven't been posting, but things are a bit chaotic for me at the moment as I settle into a different routine with new commitments and responsibilities. I hope to return to blogging more regularly really soon. I have several books I've read and loved that I need to review as well as more giveaways I need to organize. There are also a few things on my mind that I'd like to talk about--just need to organize my thoughts and find a way (and time) to talk about them.

Second, I WAS INTERVIEWED!!!

Alison Miller recently interviewed me for the Write Brained Network, an online community for writers in every stage of their writing careers. It's a brilliant community, one of which I'm proud to be a part. I encourage you to check out this community HERE and join in. It's a great way to meet other writers and gain some insight on all aspects of writing and publishing. And if you'd like to check out my interview by Alison, she posted it HERE on her blog. PLEASE do stop by. Seriously. I'm begging you. Not only is Alison a beautiful person with a remarkable writer's blog that I know you'll love to visit (and follow, k?), my self-confidence is on the line here. Also, I divulge secrets.

Third, I'M TALLYING UP ENTRIES!!

for my last giveaway (DAUGHTER OF SMOKE AND BONE, ASHES, and SHIFTING). I'll post the winners HERE, just adding them to the original giveaway announcement post as I've done with my last couple of giveaways. I think (hope) it makes it easier for people to find who the winners were, as well as ensuring that anyone who comes upon the giveaway post in the future knows it has already closed. But please give me a couple of hours (right now it's 10 AM EST). It takes a long time to tally up entries and randomize them for a drawing.

So, stop by the ANOTHER GIVEAWAY post after 12 PM EST to find out the winners.

If you didn't get a chance to see who the winners were of my last couple giveaways, those are posted here at the end of the original giveaway posts:

Two ARC Giveaway (POSSESS and THE UNBECOMING OF MARA DYER)

4 ARCs 4 U Giveaway (FURY, THE SCORPIO RACES, NOCTURNE, and SHELTER)

I'm humbled by all of you who continue to stop by my blog time and time again, commenting, entering giveaways, and just giving your general support with your presence. It's an honor. Many, many thanks.

My Video Review of POSSESS...Gone Wrong

2011-08-19T02:40:00.002-04:00

If you read my post yesterday, you know that I had initially planned on doing something else to discuss Gretchen McNeil's debut POSSESS, but got tied up with technical problems.

Well, here's that something else... As you'll be able to see, nothing went as expected. And a review only kind of occurred.

PG13

I know, ridiculous.

Musical credits:
Lia Ices "Grown Unknown"
30 Seconds to Mars "Edge of the Earth"
Florence + the Machine "Heavy in your arms"
Two Steps from Hell "Freedom Fighters"
Two Steps from Hell "To Glory"

P.S. If you haven't already, go here to check out my full review of Gretchen's POSSESS as well as to enter to win ARCs of DAUGHTER OF SMOKE AND BONE by Laini Taylor, SHIFTING by Bethany Wiggins, and ASHES by Ilsa J. Bick (this one is signed). Reviews of these to follow.

Review of POSSESS and Another Giveaway

2011-08-18T02:54:00.003-04:00

I was working on something totally different and way cooler than this to discuss POSSESS, but I had to abandon it for dumb technical reasons. If I manage to work this issue out, I'll have something new for you tomorrow. Until then,

Some news:

Have you checked out the WriteOnCon activities this week? They're really on their game, offering a ton of great information about writing and publishing as well as giving you access to people in the industry. If you haven't checked it out yet, I urge you to give it a shot! (click on the image)

Also, be sure to check out my new ARC giveaway before you go (below my review!) Entries will be tallied and winners of POSSESS and THE UNBECOMING OF MARA DYER will be posted ASAP. That thingy I was working on before technical issues assaulted me kind of took up all my time. Blerg.

So, my review...

POSSESS by Gretchen McNeil

Summary: Fifteen-year-old Bridget Liu just wants to be left alone: by her mom, by the cute son of a local police sergeant, and by the eerie voices she can suddenly and inexplicably hear. Unfortunately for Bridget, it turns out the voices are demons – and Bridget has the rare ability to banish them back to whatever hell they came from.

Terrified to tell people about her new power, Bridget confides in a local priest who enlists her help in increasingly dangerous cases of demonic possession. But just as she is starting to come to terms with her new power, Bridget receives a startling message from one of the demons. Now Bridget must unlock the secret to the demons' plan before someone close to her winds up dead – or worse, the human vessel of a demon king.

MY REVIEW
The first time I tried reading POSSESS at night, I thought I might creep myself into a catatonic state.* It's not that the book is gruesome or even overly scary. It's just, I don't know--the subject, maybe? Also, I'm a wimp. A big one. As far as creepy subjects go, demonic possession is probably like number one on the list (also clowns and heroin chic). Add to that McNeil's amazingly vivid descriptions and spook-worthy settings, and you end up with this incredible work of creepawesome.

But you know what's weird? Okay, I should really have prefaced this by mentioning that I normally don't read books like this. I'm just not the kind of person that enjoys the thrill of fear. Wimp, I tell you, wimp. BUT as creeped out as I was reading POSSESS, I wasn't terrified--I didn't worry that I'd end up with nightmares. It doesn't take long to realize why either. Mainly, Bridget. The reader becomes so steeped in who she is (even with a 3rd person POV!) that you can't help but feel as she's feeling. And instead of quaking and cowering in a corner (as I'd be wont to do when faced with a demonic possession), she cracks a joke and banishes the heck out of her demons.

Which brings me to what I think is one of the strongest elements of POSSESS--the voice. Seriously, the voice alone is enough to keep a reader from sinking into the abyss of trembling fear. There's this one scene in the middle which takes normal, household items (I'll let YOU find out what they are) and combines them with demonic possession, creating something beyond Hitchcockian (think the clown in just about every horror movie), but Bridget's voice kept me grounded, letting me see through the eyes of one very jaded, hilarious teenager. Imagine a part Asian Emma Stone performing an exorcism (or as Bridget calls it, banishment). Serious entertainment.

I should probably also mention the romance. Because that's in there, too. It's not the primary focus, but it definitely occupies a good chunk of Bridget's thoughts and activity; when you get a look at the love interest, you'll understand why--talk about dreamy sigh. And then there's the priest. OMG, the priest. I should stop before I give something away. Just know I was impressed by how well McNeil crafted that relationship. There's also some mysterious backstory that is not only relevant, but beautifully weaved into the story, building up Bridget's world as something much bigger and more complex (also, cooler...way cooler) than I'd imagined. McNeil took a genre that has often felt hands-off for me and made it accessible and captivating, while retaining the creep factor that has eyes popping and fingers squeezing dents into the cover. POSSESS is a gripping (sometimes hilarious) thrill from beginning to end.

*Never once did she get near catatonia. She exaggerates. Ignore the lies. More like a state where you jump at your own reflection in the glass door.**

**Intentional 3rd person.

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Be sure to check out what the other Bookanistas are highlighting today:

WE INTERRUPT THIS BOOKANISTA BROADCAST…to celebrate WRITE ON CON! For some fun writer insights and pep talks, click along to…
Christine Fonseca , Beth Revis , Jessi Kirby and Stasia Ward Kehoe

And, we know you MUST have your Thursday Bookanista reviews so here you go!
Veronica Rossi loves Legend
Shana Silver serves up a Maureen Johnson double feature of The Last Little Blue Envelope & The Name of the Star
Scott Tracey is awed by Anna Dressed in Blood
Bethany Wiggins howls over How to Take the Ex Out of Ex-Boyfriend
Carrie Harris is in a frenzy over Stupid Fast
Gretchen McNeil is spellbound by Witch Eyes
Carolina Valdez Miller and Shelli Johannes-Wells are passionate about Possess
Matt Blackstone blogs From Bedside

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More ARCs Giveaway

This 3-ARC giveaway will run a little longer than usual, primarily because I want to be sure and get in reviews before the giveaway is over (or shortly after). But even without the reviews, believe me, they are all worth entering to win. No, really. You WANT these books.

(Click on book cover images to open summary in another window)

DAUGHTER OF SMOKE AND BONE
by Laini Taylor

SHIFTING
by Bethany Wiggins

ASHES by Ilsa J. Bick
This ARC is SIGNED by the author.

CLICK HERE TO ENTER the More ARCs International Giveaway

This giveaway is international and ends Wednesday, Aug 31, midnight EST. You must be 13 years old to enter. If you win, you will need to provide an address for shipment. Under 18's must have parent/guardian permission to enter.

Thanks for entering, and good luck!

THIS GIVEAWAY HAS NOW CLOSED. Here are the winners:

DAUGHTER OF SMOKE & BONE by Laini Taylor

Lola S.

SHIFTING by Bethany Wiggins

Spav

ASHES by Ilsa J. Bick

Maria (pronounced Mariah)

Congratulations, winners! Please email me an address to which I can send your book.

Thanks so much all of you who entered! Please stay tuned to find out about my next giveaway, coming soon. Maybe tomorrow? Hm.

THE UNBECOMING OF MARA DYER Review and 2 ARC Giveaway (TUOMD & POSSESS)

2011-08-11T03:38:00.002-04:00

Whoa. It's been a long time, huh? Those of you who have been keeping up, you know I'm writing like a mother-freck. It's got me a bit a lot freakishly absorbed. So I ended up not posting a review/rec last week and now it's got me all kinds of behind because there are just so many books I've loved recently. But you should know today was my wedding anniversary, so I've been up to my eyeballs in busy. So I've only got one review and one ARC to give away today. But it's a doozy.

EDIT: I got a bit further in POSSESS and I'm totally digging it. Cannot put it down, although I should. It's 3:23 AM. Anyway, thought I'd go ahead and add it to the giveaway...I'm a genius. I'll try to give it a full review next week. I know I still owe you a full review of LOLA and PETER NIMBLE, too. I swear, coming up! I'm totally behind.

THE UNBECOMING OF MARA DYER
by Michelle Hodkin

Summary: Mara Dyer doesn't think life can get any stranger than waking up in a hospital with no memory of how she got there.
It can.
She believes there must be more to the accident she can't remember that killed her friends and left her mysteriously unharmed.
There is.
She doesn't believe that after everything she's been through, she can fall in love.
She's wrong.

MY REVIEW

Dude. This book was NOTHING like what I thought it was. I mean, yes, okay, it was. I'm such an over-exaggerator. But really, it was nothing like what I thought. The thing is, I can't even really go into it without spoiling the whole book for you. Hm. Okay, I can tell you that freaky, unexpected stuff happens in this. You're not sure what is or isn't real--just as Mara isn't sure. It's a total mind trip that plants you firmly in the shoes of Mara Dyer. But in the midst of tripping, you will drool for one Noah Shaw.

Yes. I said it. The boy. The totally hot boy. As in, SMOking. Brains, beauty, and a killer British accent. Also, he's just cool, you know? The boy's got swag. He's the bad boy fantasy of every sixteen year old and cougar, yet he's just so nice in a totally unexpected way. So dreamy. So...hot.

But boy aside, you also have Mara, a total crack-you-up--quick-witted with a flair for the snappy comeback. Mara and Noah together is pure magic. The story in this is fantastic--mysterious, full of twists and unexpected turns--but I could've read nothing but the dialogue and loved every minute of it. It's smart and funny and dripping with innuendo. The voice in this is just out-of-the-park killer. But it's more than just voice. Hodkin captured the essence of teenagedom: the layers of emotion and the drama, the youthful insecurity and self-focus (I need, I want, what did I do wrong, it's my fault, etc.)...and blossoming desire. Ohhhhh the desire. There's just this brilliant mesh of touches and teasing and boiling hot sexual tension.

And on top of it all, you get this story that is at once a contemp and a romance and yet also a paranormal (or is it?) and a psychological thriller (or is it?)--in essence a mystery with a sizzling romance. THE UNBECOMING OF MARY DYER is a fast-paced read that will have you slowing down just to savor and breathe it in. An unforgettable read.

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Win an ARC of THE UNBECOMING OF MARA DYER by Michelle Hodkin

and

POSSESS by Gretchen McNeil. I haven't finished reading this one yet, so I can't give it a full review yet. But I hope to soon! It's totally creeptastic and gripping so far.

(See its summary)

CLICK HERE to enter to win ARC of THE UNBECOMING OF MARA DYER and POSSESS International Giveaway

This giveaway is international and ends Wednesday, Aug 17, midnight EST. You must be 13 years old to enter. If you win, you will need to provide an address for shipment. Under 18's must have parent/guardian permission to enter.

Thanks for entering, and good luck!

THIS GIVEAWAY HAS CLOSED. PLEASE SEE WINNERS BELOW.

**************************

Be sure to check out what the other Bookanistas are highlighting today:

Elana Johnson sings out for Chime

LiLa Roecker thinks Epic Fail is a great success - with giveaway

Matt Blackstone feels The Pull of Gravity

Scott Tracey is entranced by Daughter of Smoke and Bone

Carolina Valdez Miller marvels at The Unbecoming of Mara Dyer - with Giveaway

Carrie Harris is spellbound by Possess

*********************************

This giveaway has closed. Thanks so much to all who entered. The winners are...

POSSESS by Gretchen McNeil

Krispy

THE UNBECOMING OF MARA DYER by Michelle Hodkin

Kaitlin S.

Congratulations, winners! Please email me an address to which I can send your book! Thanks for entering. Another giveaway coming up soon!

If you haven't entered yet, be sure to enter to win an ARC of DAUGHTER OF SMOKE AND BONE, SHIFTING, and ASHES. Ends Aug 31, 2011, midnight EST.

Blog Neglect is Necessary

2011-08-03T02:08:00.000-04:00

Okay, so, I've been kind of absent recentish. It's because I fell into a hole, see. I'm actually trapped in a cave. Help. I'm kidding, just leave me here. I'll get out on my own.

For real, I've been writing. I've got this manuscript I'm working on that is the most exciting thing I've ever written. I can't really tell you about it, except it's just, man, I don't know. It's got me by the throat. It's the toughest thing I've ever written, too, so it's killing me.

Dude, I wish I could tell you about it. It's like, well okay, it's paranormal, right? But it's also not now paranormal. And it's also in this setting that is not ours, but it's here. And there's all this thrillerish action and a love story and all these feeeeeelings.

Sigh.

Yeah, that did no good. I hope you'll get to read it.

Anyway, my blog neglect came at the same time as Livia Blackburne's article about writers blogging--and how it's a waste of time. Timely, no? I swear we didn't plan it. Anyway, the article is quite insightful (check it out). She doesn't say you get nothing out of blogging, merely that it doesn't equate to book sales, which may be true. It seems like it could be. But I also know that blogging--and actually anything you do can have an indirect influence on anything. I suspect that blogging can ultimately have an impact on sales, though it's difficult to know exactly how much if at all. The key is to really enjoy blogging then, right? Only do it if you derive satisfaction from it. That satisfaction may be all you get. I like blogging, I'm just not good at doing it every day*. I get far more satisfaction from blogging when I feel like it, and I rarely feel like blogging every day.**

But there's one major reason I don't blog super regularly. Well, two. One, because I don't only read my comments; I also try to reply to them (if you've got your profiles linked to an email) and/or visit your blogs (if you've got one), and this can take up a lot of time. So instead of cutting back on that stuff, I cut back on my online content. Perhaps that's not wise, but I figure blogging is about interaction, at least for me. Otherwise I'd just have a website.***

Oh yeah, and reason two...I have to write, and writing takes serious time. Not only do I have a family and a home and an addiction to clean clothes, I have that paranormal thrillerish thing going on and an absolute need to write. It's that or anti-anxiety meds. Also, I have an agent who sort of expects me to write. And I want to give that to her. Me writing equals happiness for both of us. Hopefully.

So. Know that while I'm not blogging, I'm either nurturing my family or sitting on my bed writing in clean underwear. Not the ones that say "Love it or lose it." Those are way too cliché for writing a love story.

But I do miss you. I do.

*I realize this sucks for planners. My apologies to you. But if it's easier, you can subscribe by email and then my posts will show up in your inbox when they go out and you don't have to check to see if I've posted. Although, oh my word, I feel like a douche even suggesting that you might be checking to see if I posted. Does anyone actually do that? I'd feel really stupid if no one does.

**This may be redundant.

***If you'd rather have more content and less interaction, well...hm. I'm curious to know what you'd prefer, actually.

8*********************8

Oh hey! Before I forget...

If you haven't yet, be sure to check out my mini reviews and ARC giveaways of these YA books:

FURY by Elizabeth Miles, THE SCORPIO RACES by Maggie Stiefvater, NOCTURNE by Christine Johnson, and SHELTER by Harlan Coben. This giveaway is international and it ends tomorrow, August 4.

8**********************8

Also, sidenote:

I should not have eaten graham crackers in bed. MISTAKE.

Review of THE ELEVENTH PLAGUE and 4 ARCs 4 U

2011-07-28T03:02:00.006-04:00

I've mentioned this book before, but I'm finally getting around to posting a full review about it. Anyway, I'm giving away an ARC of Jeff Hirsch's THE ELEVENTH PLAGUE as well as Rae Carson's THE GIRL OF FIRE AND THORNS and Stephanie Perkins' LOLA AND THE BOY NEXT DOOR.

GO HERE to enter (or click on image of book covers). This international giveaway ends tonight at midnight EST.

BUT. I'm also launching a new giveaway today for a few more super hot ARCs. See details way below.

But first, check out my review of THE ELEVENTH PLAGUE.

THE ELEVENTH PLAGUE
by Jeff Hirsch

Summary: The wars that followed The Collapse nearly destroyed civilization. Now, twenty years later, the world is faced with a choice—rebuild what was or make something new.
Stephen Quinn, a quiet and dutiful fifteen-year-old scavenger, travels Post-Collapse America with his Dad and stern ex-Marine Grandfather. They travel light. They keep to themselves. Nothing ever changes. But when his Grandfather passes suddenly and Stephen and his Dad decide to risk it all to save the lives of two strangers, Stephen's life is turned upside down. With his father terribly injured, Stephen is left alone to make his own choices for the first time.
Stephen’s choices lead him to Settler's Landing, a lost slice of the Pre-Collapse world where he encounters a seemingly benign world of barbecues, baseball games and days spent in a one-room schoolhouse. Distrustful of such tranquility, Stephen quickly falls in with Jenny Tan, the beautiful town outcast. As his relationship with Jenny grows it brings him into violent conflict with the leaders of Settler's Landing who are determined to remake the world they grew up in, no matter what the cost.

MY REVIEW

While the Goodreads summary above provides some necessary background to the post-apocalyptic world of THE ELEVENTH PLAGUE, it implies that the story starts at an earlier, less exciting point than it does. When in fact, the story actually starts in medias res and chucks you into the beginning of the suddenly-everything-turns-to-crazy phase of Stephen Quinn's life, the point where change can occur in this truly bleak landscape, whether for the better or the worse. Hirsch makes it clear from the get-go that nothing will ever be the same for Stephen. So, yeah, I was hooked from page one--no, line one--wanting to see how Stephen was going to get along from that point on.

Hirsch completely unravels your expectations, from the first page to the last, the first death...to the last. I went into every scene expecting certain post-apocalyptic dystopian conventions to be employed and was completely surprised by twists and turns I couldn't have predicted, especially with the characters. Stephen's relationship with his grandfather and father, the strangers they help, the antagonists--none of them are predictable. It was post-apocalyptic, yes. But it was also much, much more real, with characters reacting in ways almost too genuine to even be fiction. It was eerie--and scary how real it felt. THE ELEVENTH PLAGUE is not your average dystopian with a government-takes-over-the-world-and-passes-scary-laws kind of story (not yet). It's a the-world-has-gone-to-pot and every-man-for-himself kind of story. It doesn't take place after the rebuilding has occurred, or even at a point where people are eating each other a la Cormac McCarthy's THE ROAD (although it still has that same shivery quality that can cause you to tense up all your muscles until conflict is resolved). Rather, THE ELEVENTH PLAGUE brings you into a world with a fallen government, many dead, and a scattered population still reeling from its losses. It's a world very similar to ours, except decimated, like after Armageddon if Armageddon happened yesterday.

But what sets it apart from every other post-apocalyptic story I've encountered is Settler's Landing--a relative utopia hidden within a broken world. So, here's this story that you think is going to be horribly depressing (as in THE ROAD), and suddenly it turns into something lighter and sometimes funny and sweet and romantic and awkward and everything a YA should be. And yet, Hirsch doesn't let you forget the outside world, planting subtle reminders of what lies beneath the surface calm. Settler's Landing is a shining beacon of hope for Stephen, and yet ironically has the potential to destroy the spirit within him, the shred of humanity that has thus far remained intact through loss and inhumane ordeal. THE ELEVENTH PLAGUE is a coming of age story, like all YA, with a boy who has to make choices about who he is and what he's capable of, but Stephen has to grow and learn and screw up in a situation where mistakes can have deadly and far-reaching consequences. Remarkably poignant, at once dark and light, THE ELEVENTH PLAGUE is a gripping story of adolescent maneuvering through dark times. It's as unputdownable and intense as a book gets.

*****************************

Be sure to check out what the other Bookanistas are highlighting today!

Elana Johnson points you to Human.4
LiLa Roecker glories in The Goddess Test
Christine Fonseca is impressed by Imaginary Girls
Shannon Whitney Messenger delves into The Future of Us – with giveaway
Scott Tracey and Shana Silver are wild about Wildefire
Carolina Valdez Miller shivers over The Eleventh Plague – with giveaway
Jessi Kirby celebrates A Scary Scene in a Scary Movie
Stasia Ward Kehoe embraces All the Things You Are
Corrine Jackson sneaks into Sean Griswold's Head

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More ARCs4U Giveaway

I generally only review books on Thursdays, but right now there are so many review-worthy books, so it's been tough. I'll do my best and attempt to post full reviews for the following books (which I'm giving away) ASAP. For now, I've written up mini reviews.

(Click on book covers to open book summary in a new window.)

MY THOUGHTS: Told from two different POV's, FURY is an enjoyable, fast-paced read with a unique premise revolving around the Greek furies. The characters are refreshingly flawed, and the plot eerie and dark and twisty--full of action and walloping vengeance. Made me want to sing karma karma karma karma karma chameleoooooon, but in a dark and creepy way with my eyes all intense.

MY THOUGHTS: Stiefvater's best work yet. While there is a subtle magic element, there aren't any shapeshifters. It's just dark and beautiful with a romance that breathes you in, but doesn't swallow you whole. The setting and horses are characters as much as Sean and Puck and just as memorable. Overall, a unique premise and beautifully written.

MY THOUGHTS: NOCTURNE is the continuation of the CLAIRE DE LUNE story and raises the stakes. I was intrigued by the choices Claire is forced to make, the way she's torn between two worlds. It's an enjoyable YA with a paranormal element that heightens the tension and keeps you reading.

MY THOUGHTS: Intense, high suspense thriller with touches of humor. Unpredictable mystery. It's easy to see why SHELTER has received praise from both Rick Riordan and R.L. Stine. Definitely worth picking up.

So, up for grabs: FURY by Elizabeth Miles, THE SCORPIO RACES by Maggie Stiefvater, NOCTURNE by Christine Johnson, and SHELTER by Harlan Coben

.

CLICK HERE to enter 4 ARCs 4 U International Giveaway

This giveaway is international and ends Thursday, Aug 3, midnight EST. You must be 13 years old to enter. If you win, you will need to provide an address for shipment. Under 18's must have parent/guardian permission to enter.

EDIT: The jotform site is giving me a load of trouble. I've had to create a new form. It's not my favorite, but it works. Please fill out the form below. Your entry will be recorded on a document only I can see (not on this blog). If you've already entered in my comment section or via email, no need to enter again unless you want something more official. I'll record your entry(ies) either way.

Note: you might need to hit the down arrow key to scroll to the submit button on the form. Thanks!

ENTRY FORM HAS BEEN REMOVED. THIS GIVEAWAY HAS NOW CLOSED. THANKS FOR ENTERING!

**************************

This giveaway has closed. Here are the winners:

WINNERS

FURY by Elizabeth Miles

Kim F.

THE SCORPIO RACES by Maggie Stiefvater

Shannon L.

NOCTURNE by Christine Johnson

Krazzyme

SHELTER by Harlan Coben

Nat C.

Congratulations, winners! Please send me an address to which I can ship your ARC. Thank you so much to all who entered! Your support of these authors and of my blog means loads to me. I'm preparing another giveaway to post this week. It's pretty major.

ALA Con: Part 2 (With Photos) and Giveaway Winners

2011-07-25T02:51:00.000-04:00

I figured too many photos all at once might get a little overwhelming but mostly boring, so I decided to break this post up into two parts. You can check out PART ONE of my ALA Post, if you like. This is the second half of my trip to New Orleans in June for the ALA Annual Conference.

Last post, I left off with pictures taken at the conference on Saturday, but neglected to post this fun one:

From left: Cristin Teril, Alexandra Shostak, Sara McClung, PJ Hoover, Jessica Lee Anderson, and Me. <3 <3

Sidenote: I had to type Hoover four times before I stopped typing it as HOOver. I don't know why.

Saturday night, I attended a Blogger event hosted by Stacked Books and YA Highway's Kirsten Hubbard and Kate Hart. Arrived at Tommy's Wine Bar to find a group of authors sitting outside. In the heat. My first words were: "OMG, it's so good to finally meet you Elana, holy bazooka it's hot whyareyouguyssittingouthere????"

Here I am with the fabulous Elana Johnson.

Dark and mysterious

Bright and shiny

She's just as lovely and beautiful in real life as she is online, by the way.

And with the super sweet Kate Hart. I finally remembered to snag a shot just with her. In fact, I think I might have cried, "KATE!!! WE HAVE TO TAKE A PICTURE!" and then reached longingly for her hand and tugged her to me, holding her close.

Or something like that.

Awwww, look at Sara and me. <3 <3
See you in October!

From left: Tere Kirkland, me, Cristin, Sara, and Alexandra. So fun! Loads of laughs.

A few of us capped off the night with a trip to Cafe du Monde for some beignets (more), and then we saw this guy...

Okay, so, the best thing about this picture is not the guy in the fancy feather suit, but the guy on the cell phone behind him who's totally oblivious.

Sunday, I headed back to the convention, where I got to meet up with more cool people.

Here I am with the super supremo Mike Mullin, author of ASHFALL. So fun to meet him and his wife. Lovely people. I look forward to reading Mike's book and attending his launch party in October. The line at his signing was ridiculous long. End.Less.

With the amazing Medeia Sharif, author of BESTEST. RAMADAN. EVER. I talked and laughed with her for ages, and then when I walked away, I forgot a bag of books on the floor. Doh.*

Here I am with Tere Kirkland. Love her. We spent most of the day together on Sunday. One of the kindest people I know.

Sunday evening, we met up with a large group of people for cocktails at the Newberry Reception. From left: Jenny Moss' daughter, Jenny Moss, me, Sara, Stephanie Pellegrin, Cristin Teril, Shannon Messenger, and PJ Hoover. In front: Jo Whittemore and E Kristin Anderson. (Not pictured: Michelle Hodkin, Elana Johnson, and Jessi Kirby)

After the Newberry Speeches, around 11 o'clock, some of the Bookanistas (those present) and a few others met up at the W Hotel.From left: Michelle Hodkin, Jessica Martinez, Elana Johnson, Shannon Messenger, me, Kirsten Hubbard, Kate Hart, Kari Olson, and Jessi Kirby. (Veronica Roth left early Saturday AM)

Monday morning, all the Bookanistas who were present in NOLA at the time met up for breakfast at Cafe Adelaide in the Loewes Hotel. From left, Jessi Kirby, me, Elana Johnson, Michelle Hodkin, and Shannon Messenger (Kirsten Hubbard had left super early in the morning to catch her plane).

After breakfast, we all headed back to the convention. Jessi and I went around taking pictures with all the books written by Bookanistas that we could find. There were loads, but here are a couple:

Left: With THE LIAR SOCIETY (Lisa and Laura Roecker) Right: With DIVERGENT (Veronica Roth)
By the way, this involved having to hunt strangers down and torture them with puppy dog eyes into taking the pictures for us.

Tuesday morning, before everyone took off for the airport (I was staying until Wednesday), a few of us met up for beignets one final time. Gobble gobble.

Cristin, Elana, Jessi, me, and Sara

I'm pretty sure Jessi wins for being covered in the most powdered sugar.

The End.

PS. Miss.

*You can stop hyperventilating. I recovered my bag of books.

***********************

WINNERS!

Huge thanks to all who entered my recent giveaways. I've got some winners for you.

ARC of BETWEEN by Jessica Warman

Marisa H.

ARC of THE NEAR WITCH by Victoria Schwab

Theresa M.

ARC of AFTER OBSESSION by Carrie Jones and Steven E Wedel

Sophia C.

Signed ARC of PETER NIMBLE AND HIS FANTASTIC EYES by Jonathan Auxier

Lenny

ARC of THE BEGINNING OF AFTER by Jennifer Castle

Valerie

Please email me with an address to which I can send your book. Thanks again to all who entered. Rest assured, I'll be having another giveaway soon. Err, really soon. So check back.

And if you haven't yet entered my latest giveaway, ANOTHER THREE ARC GIVEAWAY to win ARCs of THE GIRL OF FIRE AND THORNS (Rae Carson), THE ELEVENTH PLAGUE (Jeff Hirsh), and LOLA AND THE BOY NEXT DOOR (Stephanie Perkins), you still have a chance. Ends Thursday, July 28 at midnight EST. Oh, and it's open internationally! I've had winners from all over the world. Most recently Mexico, Canada, and India. Will you be next?

Review of THE GIRL OF FIRE AND THORNS and Super ARC Giveaway...Another One

2011-07-21T02:55:00.008-04:00

I actually read this book a while ago, but I've been waiting to review this until it got a little closer to its launch date--mainly, I wanted this book to be fresh in your mind for the release. Because you MUST READ THIS. It's not an order. Just, you know, a really strong suggestion. Look into my eyes...you are getting sleepy.

No, seriously, check it out.

Me with Derek Molata, TGOFAT ARC, and Brad Beaulieu

This is the ARC cover, which if you win this book, you will get. See below for the other hot ARCs you can win.

Okay, so first my review:

THE GIRL OF FIRE AND THORNS
by Rae Carson

Summary: Once a century, one person is chosen for greatness.
Elisa is the chosen one.
But she is also the younger of two princesses, the one who has never done anything remarkable. She can’t see how she ever will.
Now, on her sixteenth birthday, she has become the secret wife of a handsome and worldly king—a king whose country is in turmoil. A king who needs the chosen one, not a failure of a princess.
And he’s not the only one who seeks her. Savage enemies seething with dark magic are hunting her. A daring, determined revolutionary thinks she could be his people’s savior. And he looks at her in a way that no man has ever looked at her before. Soon it is not just her life, but her very heart that is at stake.
Elisa could be everything to those who need her most. If the prophecy is fulfilled. If she finds the power deep within herself. If she doesn’t die young.
Most of the chosen do.

MY REVIEW
YES. A fantasy YA with a strong heroine that is not also perfect. Elisa doesn't have the ideal body, astonishing self-control, confidence disguised as razor sharp wit, or all the answers. She doesn't always know what to say, she overeats and overindulges and gives in to bouts of self-pity and insecurity. Which is just...right. Because most people do all of these things sometimes, especially sixteen year old girls. So how is she strong? Well, she's not at first, at least not on the surface. Elisa has to earn her strength like most people do--through trial and tribulation. Nobody is really born kickass. THE GIRL OF FIRE AND THORNS shows us that bravery is a learned behavior. That kickassedness is not a fixed, natural trait, but an assertion that has to be made over and over--an act of sheer will and possibly even an act of defiance. And always, an act born out of necessity. How incredibly hopeful that is. I can never be like Superman. But Elisa? Possibly.

The irony is, here's this princess who is somewhat of an outcast within her own society. So while you might expect a princess to be a "chosen one," you wouldn't expect Elisa to be anything. It's like weakling Harry Potter if he knew from the get-go he were a wizard and everyone in the wizarding world thought he was kind of lame despite that scar. Elisa has to somehow overcome her own insecurities as well as the doubts of everyone else to fulfill a prophecy to save all their hides. And then she discovers that not everyone believes in the prophecy in the same way she does, so suddenly her faith, which has been her constant companion and her greatest strength, is tested most of all. There are no easy answers, no obvious choices or hidden paths that Elisa just isn't seeing. It's a complicated world of grays where she has to learn as much as she can and rely on her instincts and her faith for answers. Pretty realistic in that regard--and in many other ways.

While THE GIRL OF FIRE AND THORNS is indeed a fantasy, I sort of kept forgetting that. It reads almost like a kickass historical with paranormal elements. Yes, there are some freaky-cool things in this world, but it feels inspired by real-life elements. It wasn't your typical medieval feeling fantasy, but rather felt sort of like an amalgamation of Latin and Middle Eastern cultures with a YA fantasy twist. The descriptions are rock solid--so, so vivid, I could nearly feel the grit of sand against my skin--with a world that is rich with detailed history, religion, monarchy, and paranormal mythos. But while the world building is remarkable, the characterization is easily a highlight with fully fleshed, complex characters. The overweight girl is not one to pity and the pretty, charming girl is not one to hate. This is bigger than that. Like I said, a complicated world of grays, just like ours. Even love feels complicated in this, and thus authentic. It's not a matter of love at first sight, but love as a choice.

THE GIRL OF FIRE AND THORNS is intense, full of emotional twists and unexpected plot turns, riveting to the end. Will be available September 20, 2011.

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ANOTHER 3 ARC GIVEAWAY

I'm offering up these books, okay? Click on their covers for pop-up Goodreads summaries.

GIRL OF FIRE AND THORNS
by Rae Carson

See my review above! Please note, the ARC in the giveaway has a different cover.

THE ELEVENTH PLAGUE
by Jeff Hirsch

I read this one entirely on the plane ride home from New Orleans. It's amazing. So real and scary and just...un-put-downable. I'll get a full review up for this in a few days.

LOLA AND THE BOY NEXT DOOR
by Stephanie Perkins

I haven't yet finished this one, but Ahhh! Whipping through it. It might possibly be even better than ANNA AND THE FRENCH KISS. Not sure yet. That one is hard to top. But I'll try to get a full review up for this soon, too.

This 3 ARC Giveaway is international. Ends on Thursday, July 28, 2011. Must be 13 years or older to enter. Under 18's must have parent/guardian permission. If you win, you will need to provide an address for shipment.

Click Here to Enter Another Three ARC International Giveaway

EDIT (28July11): The jotform site is giving me a load of trouble. If you are having issues entering the giveaway with the above link, but would still like to enter, please fill out the form below. Your entry will be recorded in a separate document only I can see (not on this blog). If you have already entered via the link above or in my comment section, no need to fill out the form again. I've already recorded your entry. Thanks for your support of these authors and of my blog!

Note: You may have to click on the down arrow key to scroll to the submit button on the form. Thanks!

ENTRY FORM REMOVED. THIS GIVEAWAY HAS CLOSED. THANKS FOR ENTERING!

Also, if you haven't yet done so, be sure to enter to win my first 3 ARC giveaway for AFTER OBSESSION by Carrie Jones and Steven E Wedel, PETER NIMBLE by Jonathan Auxier, and THE BEGINNING OF AFTER by Jennifer Castle. This giveaway ends Saturday, July 23. EDIT: This giveaway is now closed. Winners were posted HERE.

GO HERE TO ENTER the other 3 ARC Giveaway.

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Be sure to check out what the other Bookanistas are highlighting today!

Elana Johnson raves about Blood Red Road
LiLa Roecker shivers over A Scary Scene in a Scary Movie
Christine Fonseca is wowed by The Near Witch
Beth Revis loves The Last Little Blue Envelope
Carolina Valdez Miller gushes over The Girl of Fire and Thorns – with arc giveaway

Bethany Wiggins cheers for Chime

Rosemary Clement Moore is enraptured by Entwine

Stasia Ward Kehoe applauds The Predicteds
Scott Tracey praises Supernaturally

*********************************

The Another 3 ARC Giveaway is now over. Here are the winners:

WINNERS

THE GIRL OF FIRE AND THORNS by Rae Carson

Emy S.

THE ELEVENTH PLAGUE by Jeff Hirsch

Mary B.

LOLA AND THE BOY NEXT DOOR by Stephanie Perkins

Sarah T.

Congratulations, winners! Please send me an address to which I can ship your ARC. Thank you so much to all who entered! Your support of these authors and of my blog means loads to me. I'll have winners posted ASAP for the giveaway that closed last night. I'm also preparing another giveaway to go up really soon. It's pretty...major.

My ALA Adventures (With Photos)

2011-07-20T03:42:00.003-04:00

At the end of June, I attended the ALA conference in New Orleans. Finally, I'm getting around to posting about it. This is the annual conference for the American Library Association. The best thing about this con is that it's not actually for writers, but for librarians. As a writer, it's tops. Not only do you have access to a giganto number of books, it's a perfect opportunity to dive into the publishing industry. Behold. Here is my adventure with photographs. Lots of them.

Upon arrival in NOLA, Wednesday. I made this trip with my family, but you won't see them here because they are invisible. Or in the witness protection program. Or just private.

This day I said, "Oh, NOLA isn't so hot. I can handle this heat. Look, my hair is barely frizzing up at all." And then five minutes later came.

Thursday, I arranged a dinner at Cochon's for a number of publishing peoples, including (pictured here) Courtney Moulton, Leah Clifford, myself, Sara McClung, Lisa Desrochers and (not pictured) Shannon Messenger, Cristin Teril, Tere Kirkland, Mary Kole, Valia Lind, and Kari Olson and a couple others whose names escape me at the moment. Here we are out in the French Quarter after dinner listening to some music. There was much laughter and a hot saxophone player who came into the crowd and played for us. I also got a really great photo in the back of our taxi, but I'd risk dog poo in my mailbox if I posted it.

Friday was the first day of the actual con, but it didn't open until the evening, so Sara met up with me and my family for some beignets. So fun! <3 Here we are at Jackson Square & then nom noming. At this point I thought, "Okay, getting a little hotter, but I have extra hairspray in my hair. I'm good. I have Sara and sugar and fried dough." Next on the bucket list: Elephant Ears with Sara.

The con started off with a bang. We hit the con floor running. But first, we got shushed by a bunch of librarians. Don't ask.

Friday night, from left: Kiki Hamilton, Courtney Moulton, Leah Clifford, Shannon Messenger, Lisa Desrochers, Julie Cross, Kari Olson, Kate Hart, Veronica Roth, Kirsten Hubbard, Me, Sarah Enni, and...gah! I can't remember. We met up at this place called...I don't remember. But it had no electricity. Ambiance was great--nothing but candlelight. But there was no air conditioning. My hair was really suffering, despite the excessive amounts of hair spray. But the adventures? I'm still cracking up. Kari said something hilarious, and also there was an almost naked guy parading down the street blowing a whistle.

Me with Kiki and Lisa. Such sweeties.

I also met Jay Asher for the first time, but for some reason, I neglected to get a photo with him. Here he is with Lisa, though:

And here I am with Kirsten, Courtney, Shannon, and Veronica. Sara, Cristin, Tere, and others had left a little earlier. Notice how we all have a leg bent? That's cuz I said, "everybody, strike a pose." Not really.

Some random shots from the actual con (Saturday). The best thing about this was the air conditioning. Although my hair was nearly toast from the trip to the convention.

With Franny Billingsley (CHIME). She had the best outfit of the con. Love the book, love her.

With Lisa at her book signing. <3

With Tere Kirkland, who is a dearie dear. I don't understand why she can't live in Indianapolis with me. We have corn here. And John Green.

Finally got a shot with Jay. I really wish I could go to SCBWI LA this year if only to see his costume for the ball.

An exhausted Sara, Cristin, Alexandra Shostak, Tere, Me, and Shannon. Cristin went all out playing the role. I came in second place, yeah? Everyone else mostly pretended like they weren't tired at all. What's up with the smiles, people?

With Cristin, my UK-expat sister. <3 <3

With Kimberley Griffiths Little (THE HEALING SPELL & CIRCLE OF SECRETS). Love her.

With Jonathan Auxier, author of PETER NIMBLE AND HIS FANTASTIC EYES. We were very excited to meet one another, clearly. Also, the camera guy mooned us.

FYI, I'm giving away a Signed ARC of PETER NIMBLE right now if you want to ENTER HERE TO WIN. You can also win an ARC of Carrie Jones and Steve E Wedel's AFTER OBSESSION and an ARC of Jennifer Castle's THE BEGINNING OF AFTER.

Um, yeah, so this post is getting long. We'll call this ALA ADVENTURES: PART ONE. More pictures to come...

P.S. My apologies for not linking everyone. I get lazy at 3:30 AM.

Review of THE NEAR WITCH and More ARCs and Prizes (And Reviews) for You

2011-07-19T03:10:00.002-04:00

For today, here's the plan. I've got a full review of THE NEAR WITCH finally. And if you scroll down, you'll also find another ARC giveaway and more.

THE NEAR WITCH by Victoria Schwab

Summary: The Near Witch is only an old story told to frighten children.
If the wind calls at night, you must not listen. The wind is lonely, and always looking for company.

And there are no strangers in the town of Near.These are the truths that Lexi has heard all her life. But when an actual stranger—a boy who seems to fade like smoke—appears outside her home on the moor at night, she knows that at least one of these sayings is no longer true.

The next night, the children of Near start disappearing from their beds, and the mysterious boy falls under suspicion. Still, he insists on helping Lexi search for them. Something tells her she can trust him.As the hunt for the children intensifies, so does Lexi’s need to know—about the witch that just might be more than a bedtime story, about the wind that seems to speak through the walls at night, and about the history of this nameless boy.

MY REVIEW
THE NEAR WITCH opens with a looming sense of darkness, an undefined eeriness that draws you in. Sort of like sitting around a campfire, listening to the beginnings of a well-told ghost story. Except Schwab's ghost is a mysterious wind and the songs of the past--whispers of witches, betrayals and revenge. There's also an edge of sadness because of a loss, but it's not too bitter as it's reined in by Lexi's unrelenting spiritedness, presenting a sharp contrast to the emerging gloom. As the story progresses, the mystery that sprouted at the beginning takes a dark turn when children begin to disappear.

And then you hit page 40.

What had been before just a darkness in the distance, a mystery that begged to be solved, suddenly becomes a danger to Lexi. The mystery becomes a threat--even if Lexi doesn't fully realize it at first. But you do. I think I spent the better part of this book in a constant state of shivers. THE NEAR WITCH is a book that sucks you in and has you thinking/saying things like, "Lexi, check the charm! Make sure it's still there!" It's a book that makes you feel fully invested as a reader. Not just in the mystery, but in the characters themselves--and in the romance. The difficult circumstances within the story heighten the romantic tension, making it feel at times bittersweet.

But one of the most impressive attributes is the paranormal element. It's not that witches haven't been done before, but Schwab took them a new direction, creating such an original twist. Even the setting felt completely new--not modern and not fully old, not fantasy and yet not conventional. Some of the typical conventions of witch stories are employed, but Schwab also created some new rules--which means no expectations for a reader. The best stories are the ones you can't predict, creating something entirely new out of the old. THE NEAR WITCH is a remarkable debut--original and truly gripping.

***********************

For now, how about a couple more ARCs to win? I've got a lot of these guys. So many coming out in August and September, so some of my reviews may be a little more condensed. But you'll likely be seeing more reviews than usual. Only so many Thursdays...

Today, I'm offering:

(Click on images for Goodreads summary in a pop-up window.)

AFTER OBSESSION

by Carrie Jones and Steven E Wedel

MY CONDENSED REVIEW: Told in alternating points of view, AFTER OBSESSION is a riveting paranormal romance about demonic possession. Very spooky. It's a compelling read with hints of humor that help to dispel that darkness. So often alternating POVs feel really similar, but this one had two very distinct voices, likely because of the two authors. It was refreshing. A great read, especially for fans of dark paranormal romance.

[Signed] PETER NIMBLE AND HIS FANTASTIC EYES by Jonathan Auxier

MY CONDENSED REVIEW: I haven't read a lot of middle grade, but I fell in love with the voice in this. It's different from anything I've ever read. A certain dry humor which I found really absorbing. There's a dark undertone there, too, but it's subtle--if you really think about the reality of what's being hinted at, you realizes how gloomy it is. But there's overall a very light feel to it meshed with the darkness--sort of like the first Harry Potter. It's an adventure story, very fun. Would appeal to both boys and girls. Highly recommend it for fans of adventure middle grade.

THE BEGINNING OF AFTER

by Jennifer Castle

MY CONDENSED REVIEW: A beautiful story that is both heartwrenching and sweet. There's the potential for some serious tears, though, as it's a story of one girl's grief journey. The greatest heartbreak occurs very early on. But unlike some of the other grief stories that are out there, it's not a constant emotional battle. There are a number of happy moments to relieve the tension. Moments of laughter. Overall strong characterization and voice. A memorable contemporary.

So, up for grabs: AFTER OBSESSION, PETER NIMBLE, and THE BEGINNING OF AFTER

Click Here to Enter to Win my Three ARC International Giveaway

Giveaway ends Saturday, July 23, 2011, Midnight EST. Open Internationally. Must be 9 years to win PETER Nimble and 13 years to win AFTER OBSESSION and THE BEGINNING OF AFTER. Under 18's must have parent permission to enter. If you win, you will need to provide an address for shipping.

Thanks so much for entering. Good luck!

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Finally, I wanted to tell you guys about a wicked fun middle grade that has just released.

BORN TO BE A DRAGON
by Eisely Jacobs

Summary:
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup…

This is what Lord Edric wants you to believe. He will do anything in his power to see that humans never come in contact with dragons again. However, he doesn't plan for Meia, the foster child who dreams of dragons, believing they are real. Or Deglan, the ten-year-old dragon who bears the ancient mark that threatens everything Lord Edric has worked for.
Join these two unlikely friends as they discover the truth behind a legend so extraordinary it will alter each of their lives… forever.

MY THOUGHTS:
Super cute middle grade! A dragon action adventure that features an unlikely bond. Some great touches of humor, as you might expect if you've been following Jacobs' Twitter. I loved her dragons and the special friendship that holds the book together. The book also features fostering as well as themes of family and loyalty. A memorable read for kids that will appeal to boys and girls.

Check out LK Gardner-Griffie's blog for a thorough, emotional review of BORN TO BE A DRAGON.

GIVEAWAYS: EiselyJacobs is hosting a huge scavenger hunt giveaway with daily prizes including two polos that feature Deglan, a dragon from her book as well as a NOOK at the end of the giveaway! Stop by Heather McCorkle's group blog Critique Sisters Corner to enter to win a copy of BORN TO BE A DRAGON.

Pretty Little Liars

2011-07-18T04:04:00.002-04:00

Hm. I'm a bit behind on things. I know. I make promises, and yadda yadda, what has Carol done, that tramp. (Or not done, as the case may be).

Seriously, I've been uber sick. Sleeping a lot, and then I take meds to feel better, and I sleep a lot more. So basically I'm feeling icky, but also I'm well rested. That's my excuse for not posting winners before now or the additional ARCs giveaway.

But I am posting winners today, FYI. I've got something else going on today, too, which is super cool and important (see below), so come back tomorrow for another ARCs giveaway, okay? I know, you're afraid you'll come back and be all like, "What? Carol that tramp, why didn't she post what she promised?" Well, I'll try not to do that. But there's just no accounting for real life, you know? Try to make some allowances for that. I don't live inside my computer, yeah? Not really.

Stupid real life.

***************

Okay, so before I announce winners, first I want you to know that

A. Denise Gover Swank has published a book called TWENTY EIGHT AND A HALF WISHES , which is awesome. I would highly recommend you check it out (links to do so will be posted below)

and

B. Denise Grover Swank may be keeping secrets. Like, okay. I suspected that something was up. Because one, she's got five kids. And yet she works her tail off. Every time I turn around she's just written a new book. And now she's gone and published one and it's awesome (see A.) And two, hello--she's got five kids. I'm still trying to figure out how she sleeps.

SO. I point blank asked her. I said, "Denise, there's no way you can write as much as you do and publish and still keep a clean house and feed the children and stay generally sane. Seriously, I think you're hiding something." Except I was really polite and euphemistic and stuff.

And she says, "Oh ho ho, I just work really hard. It's not magic--it's math. For every hour spent working, I must lose one hour of sleep. Simple. I get no sleep."*

Uh huh. Sure. I was dubious. So I did the only rational thing. I turned to her children. And they were rather forthcoming with the secrets.

Watch as they expose their mother... It's frigging hilarious.

Okay, so that was pretty brilliant. Leave it to your children to expose all your dirty, little secrets. And look so dang cute while doing it.

And guess what? Denise is just as humorous in her writing as she is in real life. That same lightness and sense of frivolity, that charm you saw in her video is captured so beautifully in her book. There's also a sexy, sweet romance and a great mystery, too. Be sure to check it out. Here's some info:

TWENTY EIGHT AND A HALF WISHES
by Denise Grover Swank

Summary: “It all started when I saw myself dead.”

For Rose Gardner, working at the DMV on a Friday afternoon is bad even before she sees a vision of herself dead. She’s had plenty of visions, usually boring ones like someone’s toilet’s overflowed, but she’s never seen one of herself before. When her overbearing momma winds up murdered on her sofa instead, two things are certain: There isn’t enough hydrogen peroxide in the state of Arkansas to get that stain out, and Rose is the prime suspect.

Rose realizes she’s wasted twenty-four years of living and makes a list on the back of a Wal-Mart receipt: twenty-eight things she wants to accomplish before her vision comes true. She’s well on her way with the help of her next door neighbor Joe, who has no trouble teaching Rose the rules of drinking, but won’t help with number fifteen– do more with a man. Joe’s new to town, but it doesn’t take a vision for Rose to realize he’s got plenty secrets of his own.

Somebody thinks Rose has something they want and they’ll do anything to get it. Her house is broken into, someone else she knows is murdered, and suddenly, dying a virgin in the Fenton County jail isn’t her biggest worry after all.

Winner of The Beacon – 2010 Unpublished Division, Mainstream Category.

TWENTY EIGHT AND A HALF WISHES is available in print and e-book at Amazon and Barnes and Noble.

HUGE thanks to Denise for sharing her video! And an even BIGGER THANKS to Julia and the children for roasting their mom publicly. Now that's LOVE. <3 <3 <3

Oh, and want a chance to win a copy of Denise Swank's TWENTY EIGHT AND A HALF WISHES? Critique Sisters Corner is hosting a giveaway. Be sure to check it out!

*I may be lying about her saying this. And possibly about me even asking the question.

**This had nothing to do with anything. I was just wondering what Julia was cooking and thought perhaps you might be wondering too. I'm hungry. Please send cake.

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Annnnnnnnd now. Winners!

1.

Personalizedm Signed Hard Cover of A SCARY SCENE IN A SCARY MOVIE by Matt Blackstone

Lisa P.

2.

Signed Copy of PERSONAL DEMONS

AND

ORIGINAL SIN by Lisa Desrochers

Elizabeth (Swords for Fighting)

Congratulations to both winners! Please email me with an address so I can send you your books. Thank you to everyone who entered! I very much appreciate your support of these authors and of my blog. More giveaways coming right up. Stay tuned!

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Oh, and don't forget! If you haven't entered to win ARCs of Victoria Schwab's THE NEAR WITCH and Jessica Warman's BETWEEN yet, maybe consider it, yeah? HERE IS WHERE YOU CAN ENTER. Giveaway ends tonight at midnight, EST.

Yes, I'm Late

2011-07-15T18:48:00.001-04:00

My apologies to those who are waiting for me to post the winners of the Matt Blackstone and Lisa Desrochers books as well as the additional ARCs giveaway. Circumstances beyond my control and all that...

Please stay tuned. I'll post ASAP, although I haven't but a second to post this bit. So it won't be before tomorrow. Huge thank you for your patience. Like, BIG.

And for your entertainment, here's a picture of me saying hello looking stupid and also a finger.

Also, peanut butter pie.

P.S. See the post below if you haven't already. You can win ARCs. Good ones.

Review and ARC Giveaway of BETWEEN & THE NEAR WITCH

2011-07-14T01:26:00.001-04:00

BETWEEN.

How do I describe this book?

okay.

well.

For starters? 454 pages. Which I read in one sitting. One.

And when I finished, I sat there, staring off, wiping tears and stuff. I could not put this book down. I set aside my writing, for crying out loud. This is big. BIG, I tell you.

Go on. Keep reading. This is not a book to miss. And then enter to win the ARC below. And the ARC of THE NEAR WITCH. Also fantastic.

P.S. If you want to feel the fullest, possible impact from this story, DO NOT READ THE SUMMARY before reading the story. (But DO read my review. I'm a NO-SPOILER kind of girl.)

BETWEEN by Jessica Warman

Summary: Elizabeth Valchar --- pretty, popular and rich --- wakes up the morning after her 18th birthday on the yacht where she’d been celebrating with her closest friends. A persistent thumping noise has roused her. When she goes to investigate, she finds her own drowned body is hitting the side of the boat. Liz is dead. She has no memory of what happened to her, and can only observe in horror the fallout of her death.
She’s also soon joined by Alex Berg, a quiet boy from her high school who was killed by a hit-and-run driver. The two keep each other company, floating in and out of memories and trying to piece together the details of what happened to each of them.
In her regular life, Liz was a runner. It wasn’t abnormal for her to run 8-10 miles per day. But as memories from closer to her death begin to surface, Liz finds that she’d been running much more than normal, and that she’d all but stopped eating. Liz’s mother, who died when Liz was nine, had battled with anorexia as well, and those around her worried that Liz was following in her mother’s footsteps. But something more sinister was consuming Liz from the inside out...

MY REVIEW

It's really hard for me to be swept away by a book in the same way I used to be swept away as a kid. Maybe it's a writer thing. I don't know. I mean, I have this ridiculous internal editor that never shuts up. But something happened as I was reading BETWEEN. I noticed it had a release date of August 2, so I picked it up, and there I stood reading this afternoon, beside my kitchen island, my Coke Zero forgotten and my peanut butter sandwich staling, and before I knew it, my legs were cramping and I was fifty pages in. I moved to the sofa and I kept reading. I noticed that my heart rate had accelerated and I was reading faster and faster, and seriously, I felt like I was having some sort of panic attack. Liz, Richie, Alex--I knew them. Within an hour, I knew them. I rooted for them. I was horrified by them. I cringed and laughed and my heart thumped thumped thumped for them.

See, the book's description on the back of the ARC did not reveal nearly as much as the summary on Goodreads, so when I got to the end of chapter one, I gasped out loud. I was stunned. And the world Warman created, criminy, it's like real and insane and real real real. What an authentic voice. You know, like Lauren Oliver, except her own. We see this world of high school drama that is genuine without being totes-OMG-FML-like-whatever. So, yeah. Just real. And so are the bullies. It forces you to see the ugliness and the meanness that exists in our schools, and it keeps your eyes fixed. And sometimes that hurts. And the grown-ups? The real life drama of adult life? It seeps in so authentically, meshed so perfectly with the complicated lives of these teenagers from every walk of life. No caricatures or stock characters--just real and complex and multi-faceted.

Have I said real yet?

It sucks you into this world that is ours, but there's a strong, supernatural current that you must navigate as you move through this/our world. But the way it's told, the way the story unfolds, I bought it. I never once questioned it. There were all these pieces to the puzzle of this book--which is a gorgeous love story with a supernatural element and a mystery--and everything came together so brilliantly. There's also some serious darkness to this book, issues that affect so many of our teens, and they're dealt with in a non-preachy, realistic, relevant way. But the most amazing thing? Warman was able to make me weep for a character that at one point repulsed me. Talk about incredible characterization and unbelievable craftmanship. I was so moved. Swept away. Breathless. BETWEEN is truly unforgettable--a beautiful, cautionary story that defies expectations, forces us to confront our darkest realities, and reminds us just how fragile and precious and hard life really is.

BETWEEN will be available August 2.

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ARC(s) GIVEAWAY

Now, if this review has piqued your curiosity, perhaps enter my giveaway, huh?

I'm giving away one ARC of BETWEEN by Jessica Warman.

I'm giving away this ARC, too:

THE NEAR WITCH by Victoria Schwab

Summary: The Near Witch is only an old story told to frighten children.

If the wind calls at night, you must not listen. The wind is lonely, and always looking for company.
And there are no strangers in the town of Near.These are the truths that Lexi has heard all her life. But when an actual stranger—a boy who seems to fade like smoke—appears outside her home on the moor at night, she knows that at least one of these sayings is no longer true.
The next night, the children of Near start disappearing from their beds, and the mysterious boy falls under suspicion. Still, he insists on helping Lexi search for them. Something tells her she can trust him. As the hunt for the children intensifies, so does Lexi’s need to know—about the witch that just might be more than a bedtime story, about the wind that seems to speak through the walls at night, and about the history of this nameless boy.
Available August 2.

MY THOUGHTS

I only just started this one, so I can't do a full review yet. But oh my word, so far it's fantastic. Very eerie and mysterious. Lexi is such a rich character. A gripping read thus far. Check out Shana Silver's review of THE NEAR WITCH. Stay tuned for my full review!

Okay, so, here's the part where you enter to win ARCs of BETWEEN and THE NEAR WITCH. This giveaway is open internationally. Ends Tuesday, July 18, 2011. Thanks for entering and good luck!

Click here to enter ARC of BETWEEN and ARC of THE NEAR WITCH International Giveaway

(COME BACK TOMORROW FOR MORE ARC GIVEAWAYS and to find out the winners of Matt Blackstone's Signed A SCARY SCENE IN A SCARY MOVIE and Lisa Desrochers' Signed PERSONAL DEMONS and ORIGINAL SIN.)

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And here's the part where you check out what the other Bookanistas are up to today:

Elana Johnson revels in Ruby Red
LiLa Roecker is nuts for I’m Not Her
Christine Fonseca interviews picture book author Michelle McLean – with giveaway
Beth Revis reveals her reading recommendations
Jessi Kirby discovers Where Things Come Back
Shannon Whitney Messenger swoons for Supernaturally – with giveaway
Shelli Johannes-Wells features “guestanisto” author Matt Blackstone
Carolina Valdez Miller is bedazzled by Between – with giveaway
Shana Silver wonders at The Near Witch
Stasia Ward Kehoe celebrates Selling Hope